I guess that never meant to happen. 
I wish I wish I could change that.
Always thinking it's the end but, it always comes back, and worse than before. 
So I keep asking to myself why do I bother continue?
The answer is that I'm scared, scared of what will happen when I'll end my endless suffering, everything will be gone the darkest as the brightest moments, nothing I will see, my breathing and my screams muffled by the emptiness, where am I ? Nowhere.

I dedicate some of the brightest moments I shared with two kind souls that deserve the better in their life:
Mika and Choki, I hope my words reach you wherever you can be. Don't loose hope because sadness is not permanent, as much as our life is, the darkest moments are temporary.

And to you, who read this, may your life be as calm as a river. 

These were my last words, my end will be silent and painless like my tears that I shed.