I, Jonathan Christopher Morgensterns's wife, solemnly swear that I will tell the truth, and only the truth in this following statement.
I am awesome.
As awesome as awesome gets.
I also loathe human beings.
As loatheful and loathe-ing gets.
But I LOVE Sebastian, since he's the best person EVER!

My friend, well, she's an enemy but let's keep it simple, Jonathan's step-brother's wife, she disagrees with my paragraph... Here's her official statement:

Hi, don't listen to her (Jonathan's wife). All you need to know is that we are all psychotic and probably dangerous. Also, we are not human. I am a Time-Lord, Jonathan's Wife is a Demon and The Unknown is a Death Eater. We also don't believe in the real world. Books are life... And I guess Sherlock is too... And Doctor Who. Okay, I'm gonna stop typing now. If you were sensible, you would be gone off our page by now, but you're not, so keep reading until the end. 

We are three Fangirls with no such thing as a life. We are married to words we have read. The vast majority of our feelings have been concocted by words we have read and believed in. Books to us are like bibles to religious old people. We don't exactly NEED them, but if we let them go, we'd lose all hope in life.

Anyway, we should let you go. Auf Wiedersehen, Und möge das Glück stets mit euch sein. {Good bye, and may the odds be ever in your favour!}