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Hello, everyone. Ladies, gents, other individuals of whose pronouns I'm not aware of...
I'm more or less treating this as something of a diary entry, and you all can feel free to do that as well. As I do not keep a diary, getting this off my chest in this way is about the best I can do.
I know I haven't written or updated or done... well... anything in quite a long time. While there is no excuse for that, I feel the need to explain myself anyway. I don't know if anyone is going to read this, or care for that matter, but this one little post is more for me than anything.
I've been struggling. Hard. I seem to have lost the motivation to write or keep up with the basic mechanics of day-to-day life, and ended up getting lost for months in reading which is more of escapism from real life than anything.
But just a minute ago, something clicked, and GODS I hope it sticks for longer than the amount of time it takes to read this post, because I seem to have a problem following through with decisions that I make these days.
But I had a "squirrel" and did a Google search on my old pen name only to find that apparently somebody out there recommended Blood and Ink, an old fanfic I wrote, under a reddit post where the OP requested their "favorite lesser-known fics" and that threw me for a loop. I nearly cried over it. Even more so because I took all my fanfictions down and deleted them. They're still in the recycle bin, I think, but I digress.
I had no idea I was making an impact on anybody or that anybody really gave a shit about the little drabbles typed out on my laptop. It then occurred to me that perhaps the silence isn't quite as damning as I thought. And that's encouraging. It really is. It might possibly be a sign that this author should step back into her roots, which is writing for the fun of it instead of focusing on building up a name. Gods, writing hasn't been truly FUN in ages. And that should have said something.