Eli_The_Person

( @AnOmoriFanatic )
          
          In addition to the announcement below, Vyvanse’s true name is Lisdexamfetamine, that of which made the side effects I suffered from: rapid heartbeat, delirium, panic, psychosis, and even heart failure. My heart obviously never failed but I’ve been close to a heart-attack-like heart rate. Vyvanse is also almost the same drug as Methamfetaimne, and is similar to Adderall. 
          
          Because I took my doses all at once due to not being able to swallow pills, which meant these side effects hit me ten-fold. It’s also what made me so reliant on them, and what made my withdrawals so severe.

Quickly popping back in after learning more about stimulants (what my ADHD medication was) ( @AnOmoriFanatic )
          
          I take AP Psych and we covered drugs. As some of you may know Cocaine and  Methamphetamine are also stimulants, just like Vyvanse. Turns out, the Vyvanse had the same effect on me as a long-term Cocaine AND Meth user. Changes in personality, fast heart rate, excessive sweating, general aggression and irritability, overconfidence and a SEVERE amount of self-centeredness, unhealthy hyperfocus, the feeling of being able to do anything, yet not being motivated
          
          While how I acted still hurt people, it’s now very clear to me that it was NOT my fault. I was an 11-12 year old put on and forced to take medication that caused me to act like I did, especially since I had to take a LARGE dose all at once EVERY day. 
          
          Frustration with me and any dislike is warranted and expected, but with this new knowledge, I can’t act like I was at complete fault.
          
          At the time, I was struggling severely with bullying, isolation, SH, and su1c1d3. By then, my clinical depression was at its worst, and all of that was mixed with WAY too much of a stimulant that had the behavioral and physical effects of Cocaine and Methamphetamines as well as unrestricted access to the internet. 
          
          Again, I am very sorry that I hurt everyone that I did, but I was a child severely under the influence of drugs with EXTREMELY horrible mental health. I’ve changed a lot regardless.
          
          Thank you all for being my friends, I’m thankful for all of you, but as I said, I don’t ever want to return here again.

I miss you :<

Hello everyone. As many of you may know, I’ve been gone for a little over a month now.
          
          It is sad to say, but I will be leaving Wattpad, and likely not returning.
          
          Wattpad has not only ruined its own app, but this place has never been a good space for me.
          
          I’ve made many mistakes that until taking a break, I never even realized. The worst of said mistakes involving @AnOmoriFanatic
          
          So, before I leave, I think he deserves an ACTUAL apology. 
          
          All that I said before about how the medicine affected me was true, however I failed to take into account that no matter if what I did was my fault or not, it still hurt people. And for that, I am sorry. It is true that I was a child, and still am, but that is no excuse. To grow is to learn, which is why I’m finally closing this whole ordeal with what I should’ve said a long time ago. It’s been two years since it happened, yet it lingered in my mind, perhaps because I knew I was wrong. I WAS wrong. And again, I am sorry. Forgiveness is not expected nor required, you had every right to be upset. But, I’m apologizing not only for you, but also so I can put this to rest in my own mind too.
          
          And with that said, goodbye everyone. It was nice meeting you all.

Where you at-

Zesty man :3

i can’t.

Y’all WHATTT
          
          I’VE BEEN SO STRESSED OUT RECENTLY I WAS BLEEDING OUT OF BOTH NOSTRILS ;=;

i need to stop eating cheese 

BBWUAGAHHHHHAGSHAHHS TWISTED GLISTENNNNNN ;=;