Blast off, that damn America got me into one of his hare-brained schemes again! The bloody git! He goes and makes this account, without my bloody permission! I'm not here because I wish to be, so shut it. What is Wattpad, anyway? I don't understand this!

And no, before you comment, it's not because I'm old! So sod off!

Well, now that I have that clear, I shall rewrite what that arse put as my profile info. No, I don't like talking to imaginary friends, or having 'relations' with them! Tinkerbell and Flying Mint Bunny are real, thank you very much!

Coffee is terrible, tea is by far superior!

I am an English gentleman, and will be treated as such. And this sure has bloody h*ll not turn out like the facebook America made for me......*British Rage*

0% AMERICAN
█ 10% Fairy (they're real, dolt!)
██ 20% Sailor
███ 30% Pirate
████ 40%  Top-notch film producer
█████ 50% Tea
██████ 60% Magician (MAGIC IS REAL!!!!)
███████ 70% Spy
████████ 80% Educated in the fine art of cooking (shut it, frog!)
█████████ 90% Gentleman
██████████ 100% England