Ethan H.

I feel like writing here again....
          It's almost been a year. I worked my ass off this year, and I didn't study at all. I found a new boyfriend who I'm somehow in love with, I guess. Yet, all I want is going back to that room alone, talking to nobody, reading my book on that sunny balcony, and listening to lumiere all day. I wish I could've lived in that time for a while and never been stressed out about work, money, university, love, family, and all these shits.... 
          I wish I never lived after those few weeks of being alone and in peace in that room. 

I dreamt of my little girl, my kid. She was smart and funny. We laughed and danced crazy among a lot of people. 

He said, "oh, I didn't think you would take it seriously" after I told him why you didn't talk to me or call me after Valentine's day! 
          He said it was not a date I just invited you to my house cause you were bored. And I laughed and laughed and said you're fucking jerk! 
          He is. Isn't he? Or....am I just so delusional and trapped in my mind for God's sake? 

I went on a date with a coworker on Valentine's day! It just happened. I didn't plan it. Hh
          We went motorcycling with an insane speed and we ended up laying on a couch drinking beers and singing with random songs. I said goodbye and we hugged. A tight hug, a soulful hug. I couldn't want to smell him more and he kissed my hair. Hhh. Just that. No intimate kiss, no sex, but we smiled big for the day. He said, "Bye Mr workmate"...I laughed. "Bye Mr workmate" I replied.
          
          Sigh! I don't wanna fall in love again. I just can't handle that anymore. 

Hiii, I hope you are doing well...
          I would really appreciate it if you could read my book and shower us with support through votes and comments..
          
          Their students are shipping Mr. Cruz and Mr. Davis, trying to ignite a relationship between the two teachers and hopefully become prom dates... 
          
          https://www.wattpad.com/1331903624-prom-date-for-my-teacher-ch-1-i-hate-reptiles

Nights... nights.... nights...
          Sometimes I wish this darkness and silence never ends. 

hello, my dear! Just wanted to leave a little note of apology for the chapter being up (much) later than originally stated. I’m very sorry about the wait and I hope you enjoy it whenever you get the chance to read! 
          
          Thank you so much again for your support <3

I found a place. A beautiful one
           I'm hanging new pictures on the wall. It's just for a while and I'm renting a room at a friend's house for just a month. But I'm happy now, everything's finding its way. Or at least I hope it does. 

Not so long ago, I was drinking my coffee, listening to Lumière and sunbathing in front of my balcony while reading my beautiful book in my dorm room alone.
          
          Now, I'm far away... I've got an internship which is amazing, I'm staying with a family who are constantly arguing, but at least I've got a roof over my head, I sleep three hours a day, but I read the time I can't sleep.
          
           I'm thinking about the group chat of my flatmates. the profile picture of five of us which has been replaced by the four of them without me.
          
           I hung some of the pictures I liked over my bed before I came here and I think about those feelings of mine exhibiting nakedly without me around, while they're having their coffees and teas.
          
           I didn't even say goodbye to my room, to my sunny balcony, to my bed. I wanted to come back soon!
          
          I'm miles away.
          I called him today, I wanted to say how I missed him everyday, instead I told him about all the details of my day, I told him how sorry I am calling him and bothering his day, but the signal in the subway went poor and my call got disconnected.... he didn't say anything, maybe he didn't hear it.
          
           I'm listening to Lumière now and remembering how Kafka felt in Murakami's book when he talked to a boy named crow.

I'm mad and sad and trying to be empathic at the same time. Could it work?