Growing up in a small town away from the hustle and bustle of city life, I've always loved my peace and quiet as much as I love walking around the park with my trusty ol' pal, Slippers the dog on a nice Saturday afternoon. Just thinking about it makes me picture families with their picnic baskets sprouting up in the spreads of green, lovers strolling barefoot and hand in hand, children's laughter providing a background soundtrack to it all. Isn't life just fantastic?

No. Because all of the above sentences are purely lies. I live right in the middle of the hustle and bustle of the city, I don't have a dog called Slippers and I spend my Saturday afternoons in Art and Violin lessons. Also, the only park I have nearby is filled with shallow-minded men who whistle even when a fat kid like me walks by.
That's about all you need to know right now.