Tenny

*radio show host voice* On tonight's edition of misery; we have returning favorites such as: I Am So Stressed Out and Someone Notice Me Please, and introducing a special feature of Do I Love This Person Platonically Or Romantically??? Stay tuned for more!!

I cry and beg for someone to notice me.
          I scream in the night hoping someone will pick up.
          I curse myself and hit my head because of the stupid things I've said that I cannot take back.
          
          You took advantage of me. 
          You took advantage of my patience and how I will forgive you. 
          You took advantage of my naive, blind love for others and this seemingly hopeless world.
          
          Why am I like this? 
          Why do I sit here making myself miserable simply because you don't respond to me?
          Why do you act like you care only to abandon me in time of need?
          
          Why do you say you love me?

"Just be yourself"
          
          Shut your neurotypical, small-minded mouth. 
          You could not possibly comprehend why that is impossible.
          
          You say be yourself yet tell me to stop when I flap my hands when excited or nervous.
          You tell me to not lie to myself about my identity yet scorn me for info-dumping. 
          You say for me to be myself but berate me for avoiding eye contact.
          You yell at me when I have no voice. 
          You tell me to stop being so sensitive despite the fact it feels my skin is on fire.
          
          You tell me you love me as I am, yet you make no attempt to show it.
          You tell me you cherish me, yet you ignore me. 
          You tell me you would do anything for me, yet abandon me when I need you most.
          You push aside the fact I cried myself to sleep simply because I felt unloved.
          You tell me all these lies and expect me to accept them as truth.
          
          "My happy girl, I'll miss you." 
          
          I am not your happy girl anymore. 
          It would break your heart if you could know the truth. 
          
          I've reached out to you so much and you try to tell me I'm overreacting. 
          You tell me it's not a big deal.
          You played with my life and my mind as if they weren't fragile.
          Why would you hurt me like this? Do I not mean the world to you anymore?

We love torturing ourselves during Discord calls with friends and making ourselves MORE depressed

Love it when your friend's energy does NOT match your hyper-excited energy and then you feel absolutely CRUSHED for being excited about something but then you shrug it off because people have been doing that to you for years to the point you expect them to react this way

I became a writer so that I could have an excuse for the bizarre facial expressions, random laughs, and other such nonsense that happens while I partake in the cursed practice of maladaptive daydreaming

We just /love/ having such a shitty day that we literally start sobbing at a fucking gas station because our brother asks us what happened and we just realize how much we hate ourselves and how jealous we are of other people but we don't want to be selfish 
          
          
          
          Yes I am talking about myself in the plural.

If you are still a child, please, by all FUCKING means PLEASE take the time to still be a kid. Please. Like I'm begging you. Because one day you blink and suddenly you're applying to colleges, scholarships, and a fucking job. All while still in highschool. So please. I'm begging you. Take the time to be a kid.

I just realized I'm still in love with one of those people and this is fuckin me up

That awkward moment when your English teacher assigns a love poem assignment and you decided to write yours addressing the girls you've ever been in love with but then remember you go to a Catholic school and you are a girl so you have to change it so the gender of the person(s) being addressed remains ambiguous