@FreeOfFreedom
Roast me
@FreeOfFreedom Nice to see you're not dead. .-. *Checks date* F**K! anyways .-.
Stuff that was said today
Some guy at a self checkout in the grocery store: Aw crap! I left my wallet in the truck!
Guy: *realizes it's in his hand*
Guy: Aw crap! I left my wallet in my hand!
Fell asleep while still wearing contacts. My eyes were glued shut this morning, but at least I'm not blind!
Nice background picture
@MaskedMaple Can you send it to me on another social media? I'd like to have it saved...
My birthday is this week what're y'all getting me?
My mom just told me to fix our toilet, except I have never done that before, so I just took the plunger and jammed it in repeatedly (making awful jokes the entire time) until it started making weird gurgly noises so I stopped and I'm pretty sure I made it worse lol.
Happy April Fools!
So far I've hidden a muffin my sister was saving, put toothpaste on the handrail in the stairs, peanut butter on every doorknob, and salted the water jug. My family has only noticed the first three.
Update #2: I was grounded for the weekend. Toothpaste is hard to clean off railings. I regret nothing!
I'm at school, running on only 6 hours of sleep and anger
WHO WANTS TO TALK?! I SUGGEST STRONGLY THAT SOMEONE TALKS TO ME BECAUSE I AM A BORED, SELF DESTRUCTIVE TODDLER WITH A 2L COCA-COLA AND A ROLL OF MENTOS
Heyo