Alrighty... so this entire thing is just gonna be me venting- feel free to tell me if you want me to stop since I know so many ppl are tired of Wattpad drama, including me. I don't wanna add to it so I'm venting privately!!
sigh... I hate this vro...
if you even saw the 100+ conversation me and color had on my profile, you would know something is off IMMEDIATELY. I wouldn't suggest checking it out tho, it will only make ya sad and I don't want that for you!! :c
I'm just... really tired, y'know? Of life, of putting up this stupid mask that gives me joy only for so long, of being subject to being made fun of, of... of just existing at this point. I'm tired of dealing with everything, and I'm trying to cope and be fine, and be the Strong, supportive, older-sibling like S0ul that everyone sees be as, but it's hard. It's so hard when you have to physically force a smile on your face when you're supposed to laugh, and the only time you can truly breathe is when you interact with the people you know online.
my head hurts, my chest hurts, my arms hurt, everything fvcking hurts, and what can I do to stop it? Just keep being that strong, strong person that doesn't want to worry anyone. Keep being supportive, keep comforting everyone, keep being that silly, silly S0ul that has too many inside jokes and is always there for everyone!
its hard.
I'm getting made fun of at school constantly. Remember that friend I mentioned? One of three I have that are genuine, including my wife. Everyone's always asking me for more and more and more and when I finally break, it's just me being dramatic!
They'll ask for more, "Help me with my work, S0ul!" "Be partners with me, S0ul!" "What are the answers, S0ul!" But is it so hard to just leave me alone?
I feel like I belong nowhere but online. You guys are the only ones that truly care. It's sad that I would rather talk to you about this than my own parents, because I know they would just go tell everyone like everyone else will. (1/2)
