GIGS782

Can u review one of my stories? It is called: The Players? 
          
          Thank you
          
              %u2022~Supersillydaisy~%u2022

@GIGS782 i'm actually very flattered, personally i understand your criticism entirelly and if i'm quite honest i really don't like the story. after begining my first (and still uncompleted - shame on me) story i found that actually it was hard to get feedback on your writing unless you wrote about what people were most eager to read at that point so i combined what seemeed to be the three most popular story lines, however as it was something i didn't really find to my style i struggled greatly with it but i'm really grateful that you gave me a review and i'm sorry i haven't had a chance to read up until now but unfortunately my laptop was broken thank you loads, cooper :) 

Ello there :) would you mind checking out one of my uncompleted stories?
          Thanks, it really means a lot to me!
          :)

Hi there! Mind checking out the first chapter of my story, letting me know how it is? I'm working on the second chapter (It's still a draft that's why it says two parts but it's actually not, it's one part and working on part two) 
          
          I would appericate it, thanks!
          
          xoxo
          Neptunes_Sister 

Hello. :)
          Would you please review my story "Remember or Forget?"? I don't mind you being completely honest with me, because it will, hopefully, help me with my writing.
          Can I also ask you to look at my poetry collection "Unspoken Mind" and/or my various micro-stories. They are short so won't take up much time, the longest being "The Night Child" which is only a page long. (I told you they were short!) I'm not asking for a review on any of these, just to read them. Thanks!
          Storm =]

"Deaths Company"      LetiWishes
          Might come back to
          This story was like riding a rollercoaster!  It had such low points that I wanted to quit reading.  The only thing that made me stay was during the high points, the story got really good. There was no middle, just up and down, and up and down.  Every story has this, but the down parts are still supposed to keep the reader enthralled.  Grammatically, the story was written well.  The author’s biggest problem was mixing up words such as using “me” for “my” or “heart” for “hurt”.  This happened quite often.  
          I do have to give credit where credit is do.  The author used great descriptive vocabulary.  This paired up with the author’s vivid imagination made the writing very intriguing.  Favorite line: “…, and I couldn’t help but notice the house seemed to hum as though crying, and the walls and halls seemed to wisp and churn as though in pain.”  I read this and immediately thought the author would make a great poet.  This was confirmed when I later checked out a little of her poetry. Overall, it has an interesting basis behind it, but the story itself did not connect with me as a reader.     Up to Ch.20    ***
          

"Uncontrollable Urges"      Just-Krissy
          Following
          Deet?!?  Ha-Ha!!  Laughing my “you know what” off!  That is defiantly something new to a vampire story.  Yes, some things were similar to other stories, but different twists were thrown in to make the story original.  This was also helped by the author’s descriptive nature and using unique comparisons such as the snow being icing sugar.  This is a really entertaining story that flowed together very well.  There was always something happening, which made it a quick read.  Something that I loved was that everything in the story has a purpose.  There was not a whole bunch of rambling that had no real significance.  Along with being entertaining, it was also written very well.  Other than missing or switching a small word here and there, there are no big issues. I laughed, gasped, and pulled out my hair all in the same story.  I swear I now have a sore lip from biting (no pun intended) it in suspense.  This story has topped the other vampire stories I have read as of today on Wattpad, and has gotten the highest rating.  In my library!    Up to Ch.15      *****

"Damaged Goods...Don't Give Up on Me"    lovestruck0
          Following
          It was nice to read a story that has some substance for a change.  Not only is there the story that is on the surface, but also an underlining story of the main character trying to figure out the meaning of the word “love”.  I know that it sounds corny when put like that, but it works.  The inside of a teenage girls mind is very complicated yet very simple at the same time.  Girls are usually over thinkers that are normally nervous about all different things, but at the same time put on a brave front to survive the world around them.  The author hit the nail on the head with this one, and it turned out very realistic.  This is a good thing because the majority of the story is what is going thru the character's head.  I love how descriptive the author is in her story.  Everything is explained, all the way down to what a noise sounds like, which made it very interesting.  This worked very well in the love scene, which let me tell you was a Va-Va-Voom, make me feel all warm and fuzzy (not the teddy bear and rainbow kind), love scene.  One for the books!  One thing!  I knew you were waiting for it.  Is it just me or did “Amy” turn to “Abby” in Chapter 20.  Got a little confused there.  Don’t care though, still looking forward to the next chapter.  Up to Ch.20    ****.5

"Vietnam"     Little_G
          Read
          This one page story is a power hitter.  Man oh Man!!  By the end of the story my jaw was on my desk, and I was holding off the tears.  The author had such a detailed setting and good composition that it literally puts the reader into the war.  Warning…not for the faint of heart.  It’s hard to believe that there could be so much emotion packed in one page.  Very powerful!  This author I believe found her specialty, and has become one of my favorite short story writers.  Now in my library, check it out!  *****

"A Rainy Summer"     modi77
          Will not come back to
          **Eye-rolling** In fact, that is what I did throughout most of the story.  More than not it was just overly dramatic, which made some parts unrealistic.  There is nothing that is too wrong with this story; I just couldn’t get into it.  Sometimes you can, sometimes you can’t.  The author does have the reader asking numerous questions about the story.  This is good on some level because it makes the reader want to come back and find out the answers.  Sometimes though, there are too many questions.  What’s going on with him?  What’s wrong with her?  Is there a connection here?  What’s happening between them two? What’s his story?  (Overwhelming, huh?)  I believe this is what made me lose interest.  There was not enough information in the story to wet my whistle.  Then I compared my need to find out the answers to using that time in beginning new stories or catching up on old ones.  The latter won out.    Up to Ch.5     **.5