Esperanza

Y’all ever just reread your fics and go “oh. That’s terrible.”?? Cuz I get reminded of it every time someone comments lmao I love it when people do comment but I feel the urge to apologize to the commenter for how fucking bad it is. 
          
          Anyways, hope y’all have a good day/night, I should be updating relatively soon!

(2/2) Posted in HxR Pt 2, but if you haven't read it:
          
          TRIGGER WARNING: MEDICAL STUFF, DEPRESSION, MENTIONS OF EATING DISORDER
          
          We tried everything to make the situation better, but ultimately, the school refused to help me and I had to drop out. I loved it there, the teachers, the doctors, the classes, the majority of the people. I hope I can go back in the future.
          I still am having health problems. I've cut out a lot of food, starting with comfort foods. It hurts a lot, and I'm hungry all the time, but we still don't know what's going on. I've done ultrasounds, blood draws, lab tests, I have an upper endoscopy scheduled for June 3rd. I'm scared, funnily, not for the camera going down my throat, but for the IV because it has needles. I did get my COVID-19 vax and boost, but the IV scares me more than a vaccine. 
          I've been living back at home, and I had a job at a candy store, but I had to quit because I couldn't move anymore. I work at my dad's screenprinting shop now, and it's fun! I get to make my own stickers and I'm making a website soon to sell stuff. On my birthday, which was 12/15, I couldn't even have a birthday dinner without keeling over on a couch. Funny enough, I wish I at least got to have a slice of my own birthday cake.
          This whole thing threw me into a large depressive period, and I still feel awful about anything and everything. I almost got committed to a mental hospital a few weeks ago. I got put on an even more restrictive diet. I have no motivation to write anything, I try with my longer fics (I've got a 10+ chapter MorixOC I'm in the middle of ) but I just don't know what to do anymore. 
          I'll try, I swear, to pick this all back up. I just ask for patience and understanding. 
          Thank you.

(1/2) Posted in HxR Pt 2, but if you haven't read it:
          
          TRIGGER WARNING: MEDICAL STUFF, DEPRESSION, MENTIONS OF EATING DISORDER
          
          Hi y'all, it's been a while.
          
          I graduated in 2021, and going to college was my dream. I was going to San Francisco State University, I was getting married to my best friend, and my other best friend was healthy and safe.
          I lost both of them since they decided to overstep boundaries with alcohol when my parents were on a vacation, leaving me alone in the house. I then realized how toxic and unhealthy they were, kind of wished I saw it sooner.
          I get to college and my dorm was awesome! I had a kitchen and a private bathroom attached to our room. I had one other dorm mate, and she was fine until she wasn't. She was very controlling with cooking, socializing, etc. I wasn't allowed to do anything except go to classes by myself, I made only a few friends, and It quickly became worse in my room. 
          She started being really passive-aggressive and rude and blamed a lot of it on previous trauma and ADHD, which I understand, but it shouldn't be an excuse for actions that harm other people. I tried talking to her, compromising on things, but she just wouldn't listen or acknowledge. So, I tried to file for a room change, and since it was a roommate problem, the RAs were the only ones to help.
          They did nothing, my roommate was the victim and when I tried again to change rooms, the school refused.
          I got sick. I couldn't eat, drink, nothing was staying down. I've had a history with anorexia, so this was making my anxiety rise to higher levels than I have ever seen. I talked with doctors, psychiatrists, the works. Everyone in the Student Health Center was amazing, and if I didn't have them I probably would have been hooked up to an IV. In fact, I should have when my parents picked me up to stay home for a week.

Hey Everyone! I know I haven't updated in a very long while, and most of you are looking for more one-shots for the Homestuck X Readers. I live in California, more specifically, the tiny town called Felton. If you've been catching up with the news, or if you yourself live in the same area, you know that the area is on fire. The towns next to us are on fire, the mountains are on fire, and the college up the road from us is on the evacuation list. I was on that list as well, and I have evacuated two days ago. It weird and scary and I hate it, but I now live in my dad's screenprinting shop, Broprints. I'm planning on coming out with a bunch of stickers and shirts, will be posted later. So I'll try to write if I can, but honestly, I've been having a hard time writing in quarantine overall. I'm sorry about that. I'll do what I can. I love you all, stay safe, wear a mask, and pray for Santa Cruz, California; we are in desperate need of help. Bye.

2/2 As I type, there are people protesting in countless cities for the equality of black people. Only in 1964, only 56 fucking years ago, was segregation outlawed by the country, yet racism and racial profiling is still happening. People are dying in the streets for needless reasons. People are arguing for the rights that we should have never taken away from someone.
          
          George Floyd was murdered because he used counterfeit money. White boys at ages 18-20 shoot up schools and are proclaimed mentally ill. Willie McCoy was murdered for sleeping in his own car. White people bring guns and wear no masks when arguing to cancel the quarantine during a pandemic. Black children cry to their own mothers and fathers that they fear for their lives because they happened to have melanin. Our white president cries because Twitter censored his tweet about sending people to hurt the protesters. 
          
          For those who support this message, I do want to raise awareness about ALM and BLM:
          
          All Live matter dismisses and denies. It is a way of saying that all lives are at risk, that they are equal in fear and oppression. The minorities are at higher risk. At this point in time, use Black Lives Matter. Not all lives are equally at risk, because if a black man uses his phone, he gets shot. If a white man uses a gun, he's let go. 
          
          As a white person, I apologize to everyone in any generation about what my past generations have done. I want to help, so just give me the word and I'll fight for you as well. 
          
          WE. ARE. THE. SAME.
          
          BLACK LIVES MATTER.
          
          JUSTICE FOR THE FALLEN.

If you follow me, and you support Trump, you support the hate against black people, you support the violence against the people and the protests.
          
          Get the fuck away from my work. Stay the fuck away from my profile. And don't you dare even try to talk to me, you sick bastards.
          
          I have no tolerance for people who say they can't help it, it's just how they were raised; I've seen people learn and grow from it. People who are still stuck in their racist and hateful ways and who refuse to change don't get my words, they get my fists. 
          
          People who support cops, stay away from my profile. There are good people but not good cops, and you must learn that with the power that they are granted, the good person can become the next killer. 1/2

Hi so I just learned something that makes me smile from ear to ear:
          
          I was watching We Bare Bears, cuz cute and happy and smiles, and one of the voice actors for an episode in season 4 is Dante Basco, AKA Zuko from ATLA, AKA my favorite boi beside Sokka. So I looked a little more into his filming and voice acting. It was fun to see he acted for Hook, a good movie with Robin Williams. but then, I saw something that made me literally shriek from happiness, confusion, and humor.
          
          HE VOICES RUFIOH IN A LET'S READ OF HOMESTUCK BY VOXUS
          
          GUYS
          
          IT'S HEAVENLY. IT'S GREAT. I'M SO IN LOVE. RUFIO PLAYS RUFIOH. 
          
          AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

What Homestuck/Hiveswap character should I draw?

How’s everyone doing in quarantine?
          Yeah, I don’t like it either. But now I get to write, read, draw, and animate more, so that’s good. A few tips to stay safe and healthy:
          
          1. Wash your hands for at least 20 sec
          2. Stay in your home/property
          3. If you’re going out into the public, stay 6 ft away from everyone
          4. Wear a mask if you are sick; if you’re not, you actually risk getting more germs on yourself as you’re breathing in a contained space
          5. Don’t hoard the toilet paper, you fool
          6. Eat healthy, vitamin-nutrient food; fruits, veggies, and meat with lots of protein 
          7. If that’s not available, but’s and dried fruit are very healthy and a crunchy snack that can be a substitute to stuff like chips and oily foods
          
          Stay safe, stay healthy, I love you guys, have a good night/day!

Should I make a Harry Potter fanfic? It’d be Fred Weasley, and I have a solid plan and idea for it, I just don’t know if I should write it. Would any of you guys read it?