hello, I just read through the entire rewrite of "Balance" and I have a few suggestions:
1. I think the reason why people keep accusing you of using AI is because the sentences tend to be very short. I have experimented with ChatGPT and found that its writing style is like that.
2. In addition, you focus on environmental details in the interactions between characters. Not a bad thing inherently, but overuse makes it a little tedious to read.
To sum it up, when you write, try to focus on whats important at the moment, and less on what surrounds the moment. Just a friendly suggestion :)