Gotta Love That

Ok vent(and that's what u mostly use this for, I can vent to people irl without it seeming as if I want attention)
          
          So I've been Sexually Harassed, but I don't consider myself part of the 97/98% cause those people have real trauma, like super scared, but the way I know if I'm super scared is that hole day is just missing in my memory, so I'm not always sure what trauma I've faced or not, but I am (in society terms) a victim of abuse with my mother, and I still struggle with it, but I think she's learning that I'm not 10 anymore, I'll be 17 in like 3 months. But that's off topic. For those I know irl always say in part of the 97/98% of women, but, I don't know, maybe I'm still in denial. I just hate having to feel this guilt about saying that I am a part of it, but never had a super traumatic moment. Idk, what do you guys think?

Ok. Imma vent. TW:Smoking
          So my friends smoke, and is 11:30 where I live. I'm trying to go to sleep but they keep snapping in the group chat smoking. I get pissed and tell them to go to sleep and stop smoking please. One tells me that I'm the only one in the group chat that doesn't smoke, is that supposed to offend me?! I lost 2 grandparents to limg cancer one when I was 2 and the other when I was 8. Smoking is triggering to me. I watch me grandma suffer, I watched her shave her head and tell me I could do it too cause my curly golden hair is too precious to shave. I watched her suffer for a year and a half one minute holding a conversation to the next forgetting how to speak as the cancer spread. I lost my grandmother, my best friend, to lung cancer after years of telling her to stop. My little sister never really got to know her. She isn't here to see me excel like she wanted to. So yes, A, I don't smoke, and I dont intend to, cause I watch my bestie die cause of it. I watched a good, one in a million, hard working woman die cause of cigarettes 
          End of vent. Thank you if you read this

Tell me your traumatized without telling me your traumatized. I'll go first
          I saw someone who wore the same hoodie as the kid who sexually assaulted 3 girls and sexually harassed over 30, including me who almost got assaulted by him twice. I almost had a panic attack

I just finished the new Owl House and holy crap! If I don't express how I feel I will have a panic attack(no joke, has happened before) 
          *Spoiler warning if you haven't seen Hollow Mind yet*
          Um first of all this whole episode have proven every theory that I have had since Eclipse Lake, or well since we learned of another human on the Boiling Isles. And also, poor Hunter, I wish I could give him a hug, but I wouldn't because forcing physical touch upon someone having a panic attack is not a good idea. Just ask my mom the first time I had one. I was swinging. I loved how King was so worried about Luz, and we should know that is was Raine, Darius, and Eberwolf as the "wild witches" they were the three who gave Eda the potion thing. I mean come on Dana, were you trying to make it obvious? That's all, I just need to rant over this. I was screaming while watching it.

I'm a lefty and holding mugs are hard. If it's designed usually you can see it cuz most our mugs are right handed, like both my parents. But a few years back my mom bought me a hogwarts mug and I've never used it so today I think "hell I'll use it" I grad it and begin to tear up. My mom got me a double sided hogwarts mug!

I just watched something on YouTube telling me that I need to grow up and out of Harry Potter because it's 2022.
          Bitch! Last I checked I'm naming my children after each of the characters, the only way I'll let go of Harry Potter is when I get Dementia, because it runs in my family. And even then I will ask my family, before I forget everything, to read Harry Potter to me every morning I wake up, to every night as I drift in my dreams.
          So don't ever tell me to grow out of my childhood

I have three moods
          1. Manic
          2. Depression
          3. ☆Garlic Bread☆

I'm watching the final season of She-Ra. I'm sad it's almost over!

"After a person is pronounced dead, their brain has 7 minutes of activity left and replays all their memories from birth to their last breath."
          
          Me:*tears excessively realizing I'll have to live painful memories all over again*

Heyy! It's been like forever since I have been here. My school chrome book has Wattpad blocked and I got a new phone so I just finally logged back in. I missed you all so much!