GrimGuy11

Chapter 11 of Demon Slayer: The Forsaken [CoTE x Demon Slayer] is coming out!
          	
          	https://www.wattpad.com/1520134644-demon-slayer-the-forsaken-cote-x-demon-slayer-11

mnemoniac

This is for chap.9 of the demon slayer fic. I can’t post this comment there for some reason:
          I’m not the best at rating things. It’s subjective. I mean, at a certain level of writing, if it’s bad enough, then even I can point to what specifically needs improving and can give reasoning, but above a certain level of writing, I can only *feel* the quality of the writing, which is inherently subjective. 
          As a standalone chapter, it’s perfectly passable, and serves its purpose. 
          It flowed well, in terms of the act of reading. It never felt overly wordy or boring, nor was it basic, and I didn’t feel my immersion break. The quality has stayed relatively consistent between chapters. So in these aspects, I rate it like a 8/10? Don’t take what I say in this regard too seriously, I’m not qualified to rate this sort of thing. However, I do have something to say. 
          What’s more important is how I would rate it in the context of the rest of the story so far and what this chapter could mean for future chapters of the story. I think it introduced/developed an interesting plot point/line in this story. 
          This whole semi-demon thing is a point of particular importance for this fic. It’s extremely relevant to the MC as a character, has potential implications for relationships in the story and characterization. It is set up to be what connects Ayanokoji to the actual overarching plot of this fic in regards to canon. And the way it is depicted so far, it should have actual ramifications for the plot of demon slayer. 
          So props for that. So as long as you properly explore and flesh out this plot point and develop the story alongside it, then this chapter (and the context of a couple of the previous chapters) will be rated highly in my books. Just make sure not to introduce plot points only to never flesh them out.

GrimGuy11

@mnemoniac thanks for the thorough review.
            
            I'll make sure to richened all the plot points. Try to remind me if you thought I forgot about them, though.
• Reply

GrimGuy11

this message may be offensive 
Bruh, I fucking lost my phone

Tipsi123456

@GrimGuy11 bruh your bad luck is worst than subaru
• Reply

ryasamori

this message may be offensive 
@GrimGuy11 Fuck
• Reply

JimmyKot

@GrimGuy11 dude, what were you doing in a deep and murky lake with your phone -_-
• Reply

GrimGuy11

I hate writing for money,
          
          But I need money,
          
          Ah, the contradiction,
          
          Anyway, here's the link for those interested (free).
          
          I tried to follow the cliche theme but with some twists (that's what I hope, at least). Just try it, it'll be better if you promote it :)
          
          http://wbnv.in/a/f7ios2Z

UltraLily

@GrimGuy11 wish you luck buddy
• Reply