@hpsangel
Oh my gosh, imagine telling your kids about all that stuff.
Mom: One year these kids killed our professor, and he was actually Voldemort.
Child: Wow, really mom?
Mom: Yep, and the next year a ton of kids were petrified by a giant basilisk that lived under the old girls bathroom.
Child: O-oh...
Mom: Yeah... and then the next year, a homicidal maniac got into out school and roamed around until some Dementors got him.
Child: Mom, are you okay?
Mom: Then there was this Torniment and a kid was killed by Lord Voldemort who returned that night.
Child: Mom, please tell me they shut down.
Mom: Then! We had this lady come to our school and imployed child abuse by makeing your carve lessons into your skin.
Child: Ohhh... that's what that is.
Mom: Yeah, it didn't keep to well.. but then! The next year there was a war with Voldemort and half the kids died and then Harry destroyed the Elder Wand... McGonagall was none too happy about that, seeing as the entire school needed rebuilding.
Child: Oh my gosh, Mom! They rebuilt it??!!
(Screeeeee)
Mom: Oh! It's our owl with the post! I recognize that emblem!
Child: *confused screaming*