Hamiltrashcat

Jessica: Well, Drew, if you see Caroline, can you let her know I’ve been doing EVERYTHING in this friendship already sooo (chuckles) it’s not like it’ll make a difference! 
          
          Caroline: Well, Drew, if you’ve seen Jessica, can you explain that friend duties DON’T INCLUDE TRASHING MY BOYFRIEND!
          
          Drew: ENOUGH! I’m so fucking done with this petty high school bullshit! I’m out!
          

Roman: So what did you think of the movie?
          
          Logan: Oh, it was good…
          
          Roman: Oh yeah? Then why’d you only rated THREE STARS on Letterboxd?!
          
          Logan: What?! you already checked?!
          
          Roman: You already rated it!
          
          Logan: Okay, I mean three stars is….it that's good 
          
          Roman: So you're saying if that movie was five babies falling out of a skyscraper you would only save three of them?!
          
          Logan:…what?!
          
          Roman: You'd let two of those babies just splatter on the pavement!
          
          Logan: That's not what that means!
          
          Roman: That’s pretty messed up I know I’d save all five…
          
          Logan: Okay FINE! It’s three and a half stars!
          
          (A beat)
          
          Roman:….you would cut a baby in half?!
          
          Logan: YOU ARE INSANE!

Hi

May: You ready to head to the party? 
          
          Francois: Yes, but remember the little signal that we worked out for when I would like to, you know, go.
          
          (At the party)
          
          Francois (through a megaphone): I would like to go now. I would like to get the fuck out of here. 
          
          (May excuses themself and tiptoes toward him)
          
          Francois:...I'm going to meet you at the carriage.

(Michael is just coming out from an early dinner when he gets a phone call. It’s the stage manager at the Sondheim)
          
          
          Michael: Hello?
          
          
          S.M.: Hey, Michael, I know this is very last minute but we’re stretched out with our swings and I was wondering if you could come in as Shakespeare tonight?

So yes, I'm alive. And I've published a tell all about my exploits.

(When Mandy, Michael, and Cho were in Algebra class in middle school)
          
          Teacher: Okay, kids, remember, it's...
          
          All, to the tune of "Pop Goes the Weasel": (singing) x=-b±√b^2-4ac, all over 2a!
          
          Michael, under his breath: (singing) Pop goes the weasel...
          
          Teacher: Very good, this song will help you remember the quadratic formula on the test!
          
          (Timeskip to test day)
          
          Cho: (singing, in her head) ± the √ of...
          
          Mandy: (singing, also in her head) b^2-4ac...
          
          Michael: (singing, in his head) Pop goes the weasel!
          
          Michael: (thinking) Wait, that's not it! Ugh...what was the ending?! (attempting to remember it again) b^2-4ac...POP- Augh! I can only think of the original! (smacking head) GET OUT OF HERE, WEASEL!

Sup fuckers, I'm still alive somehow and now I can drink MUAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHA

Henry: Oscar just lost his seat in the Senate
          
          June: Sometimes that’s how it goes
          
          Henry: Alex’s gonna find out any minute.
          
          Alex, from the other room: AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!
          
          (Cue swearing and glass breaking, etc.)
          
          June:…..I’m sure he already knows!

(Nick is home from getting knee surgery because of an injury and is in crutches)
          
          Charlie: There he is!
          
          Imogen: (loudly and over enunciated) Nicholas, it’s Imogen, you’re gonna get through this.
          
          Nick: (also loudly) IMOGEN I HAD KNEE SURGERY, STOP SHOUTING, I’M A JOCK.