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- Vent -
I pray that 2023 will be better. I hope for everyone out there, no matter what they're struggling with, that they find the happiness out there. Maybe not today, but one day guaranteed. I hope for myself too, but until that happens, I will write books for those who seek out the love in Fanfictions and xReaders. I just cried in my bed, because with how fucking fast time flies. Recently, I watched old videos, came back to old youtubers who either A) are now revealed as groomers/pedo/haters or B) became married/engaged, left Youtube or moved their content to something completly different. I gazed at old photos of people who are lost, gone or moved somewhere else. The emptiness which overcomes you is so familiar and strange when you realize how late you are to come to this conclusion. This is my first time venting on my account, but I believe that atleast one - a single soul - out there feels the same as me. Nostalgic, full of sorrow, yet hopefull and thankfull. I want to remind myself that I'm not alone, even when it's at the other end of the world, waking at 2 am. and thinking if they should die or not, but I do feel the same sometimes.
However, I don't give up. I keep pushing with this heavy feeling in my chest. Next year I'll get my driving license, move to a different school. Right now I listen to "Bad Thoughts" by Somnium Music. I'm not depressed, have anxiety or anything, which I'm grateful for, but that doesn't mean I can't get sad.
So... be safe out there, take care of yourselves and remember: Do not give up.
See ya next year. Kudos to everyone who read this. I pray for you. ALL of you. ✌