Njala

I might do a thing we’re I change my theme each week or two if Pinterest ever starts fucking working >:<

So I asked… I sat down and talked to my mom about the binder.
          She said some slightly transphobic things but I feel like she was trying to say them in a nice way.
          Anyway I didn’t get it she said it’s just me overthinking things about my body and that there’s nothing wrong with me she said it was maybe a too big of a jump from where I am now (which I see her point) and that I have to accept who I am which I responded with “if there’s things that make me feel better in my own skin why wouldn’t I want to get it”
          It was an uncomfortable conversation for me but I tried my to see where’s she coming from she also said because I do feel uncomfortable we can go to the store and try to finds things that are not that extreme which I agreed because i’m trying to get what I can get.
          Anyway enough about my boring life how are y’all’s day going?

people with binders
          Should I ask my parents for a binder I mean I’ve been wanting one for a while but I don’t know how to even ask or explain to them why I want one. I was think of just telling them because I need it for sports (this is the one I’m asking for btw https://a.co/d/bConBEV which is like a binder/ sports bra)

So in a depressive state right now and I kinda want to vent.
          This is just me venting no one have to respond or even care I just have literally no where or one to vent.
          
          So lately I’ve been hating myself a lot more then usual, l know self hate is bad or whatever but I just do ok leave me alone I’ve already been told things that are supposed to make me feel better it doesn’t help, and I feel like a lot of it has related with my recent birthday. 
          
          Idk, idk, i don’t know what to say I’ve gotten so used to just saying I’m fine I don’t even know how to express my feelings, I just hate myself I’m mean I literally spent my weekend searching up things to do to change everything about me. I wish I could reset, restart I don’t want to live in this body anymore. It doesn’t even feel like living it just feels like I’m trying to get through each day. I want to do something I want to be… better I feel like I have no purpose and I probably don’t… I know I don’t I let everyone around me down, I’m a disappointment I disappoint myself despite the constant voice in my head telling me “be better”. I probably sound stupid, I am stupid I don’t know anything I’m a child I don’t have a valid opinion. On top of all this shit I feel and tell myself I think I’m trans which is horrible to be right now because trans people are treated like not even humans so no I’m not proud.
          
          Anyway if I continue writing everything shit about my life I’m going to cry and I don’t feel like that right now but um last thing if anyone finds a reset button for life pls tell me because I definitely want and need it, I don’t want to continue living this life.

Also anyone want to join C.ai? https://character.ai/invite/BOBII9Nh
          
          
          
          
          
          
          
          
          
          
          
          
          
          
          
          
          
          
          
          
          
          
          
          
          
          
          
          
          
          
          
          
          
          
          
          
          
          
          
          
          
          
          
          
          
          
          (Not me using you guys to get a free month of C.ai+ T^T I’m sorry guys I’m selfish)

I don’t know what to change my theme too? Maybe TDP (The Dragon Prince) or MD?

Thanks for the follow 

Not me stretching very day to help me grow taller because I’m currently 5’2

<3

Happy birthday!!!