Iwa-Chan~

heyy
          congrats on 100^^
          i hope ur doing well and remember ilysfm

I feel like I’ve kinda distanced myself from Wattpad I’m mean I only really go on here to make sure my besties are happy and well

Happy Pride month!!! 
          ️‍️‍️‍

Going on a fourteen hour flight to Germany tomorrow!!

ftf?

I might do a thing we’re I change my theme each week or two if Pinterest ever starts fucking working >:<

So I asked… I sat down and talked to my mom about the binder.
          She said some slightly transphobic things but I feel like she was trying to say them in a nice way.
          Anyway I didn’t get it she said it’s just me overthinking things about my body and that there’s nothing wrong with me she said it was maybe a too big of a jump from where I am now (which I see her point) and that I have to accept who I am which I responded with “if there’s things that make me feel better in my own skin why wouldn’t I want to get it”
          It was an uncomfortable conversation for me but I tried my to see where’s she coming from she also said because I do feel uncomfortable we can go to the store and try to finds things that are not that extreme which I agreed because i’m trying to get what I can get.
          Anyway enough about my boring life how are y’all’s day going?

people with binders
          Should I ask my parents for a binder I mean I’ve been wanting one for a while but I don’t know how to even ask or explain to them why I want one. I was think of just telling them because I need it for sports (this is the one I’m asking for btw https://a.co/d/bConBEV which is like a binder/ sports bra)

So in a depressive state right now and I kinda want to vent.
          This is just me venting no one have to respond or even care I just have literally no where or one to vent.
          
          So lately I’ve been hating myself a lot more then usual, l know self hate is bad or whatever but I just do ok leave me alone I’ve already been told things that are supposed to make me feel better it doesn’t help, and I feel like a lot of it has related with my recent birthday. 
          
          Idk, idk, i don’t know what to say I’ve gotten so used to just saying I’m fine I don’t even know how to express my feelings, I just hate myself I’m mean I literally spent my weekend searching up things to do to change everything about me. I wish I could reset, restart I don’t want to live in this body anymore. It doesn’t even feel like living it just feels like I’m trying to get through each day. I want to do something I want to be… better I feel like I have no purpose and I probably don’t… I know I don’t I let everyone around me down, I’m a disappointment I disappoint myself despite the constant voice in my head telling me “be better”. I probably sound stupid, I am stupid I don’t know anything I’m a child I don’t have a valid opinion. On top of all this shit I feel and tell myself I think I’m trans which is horrible to be right now because trans people are treated like not even humans so no I’m not proud.
          
          Anyway if I continue writing everything shit about my life I’m going to cry and I don’t feel like that right now but um last thing if anyone finds a reset button for life pls tell me because I definitely want and need it, I don’t want to continue living this life.

Also anyone want to join C.ai? https://character.ai/invite/BOBII9Nh
          
          
          
          
          
          
          
          
          
          
          
          
          
          
          
          
          
          
          
          
          
          
          
          
          
          
          
          
          
          
          
          
          
          
          
          
          
          
          
          
          
          
          
          
          
          
          (Not me using you guys to get a free month of C.ai+ T^T I’m sorry guys I’m selfish)