@Hoshi1511
So umm I just unpublished broken.
It wasn't a story anymore anyways,it was just pure gore.
But if someone still wants to read it, it's on ao3.
My username is same there as well.
You can continue reading there.
Thanks!
So I get these horrible chest pains often,and rn it's happening and this time it worse than ever..
Feels like I'll die rnミ●﹏☉ミ.
I have many ideas for stories and I have already like wrote some parts..
If I die today what will happen to my stories (●´⌓`●) they'll always be in the drafts,and the ongoing stories?(˘･_･˘).
Should I get checked?(• ▽ •;)
If I was an adult I would get checked because man these random chest pains aren't for the weak(・_・;).
Anyways if I don't post ever again after this just know I'm dead.and if I ever,ever just stop posting know I'm dead.
Goodbye (☞ﾟ∀ﾟ)☞
@Hoshi1511 if you are experiencing random chest pains often then you definitely need to see a doctor cuz obviously "We can't call this shit normal" So go jump swim run and see a doctor or else "we wont know about you
I stubbed my thumb somehow?and it's hurting so bad, it's not broken good thing.
But it's hurting ⊙﹏⊙.
I use my phone to write the stories and it's difficult to type(●´⌓`●).
But don't worry I'll update on time,I will use my index finger ◉‿◉.
@Hoshi1511 awww my hand fine now!and about school I don't really attend my school yeah(๑•﹏•)
@abcdefghijk12334 I'm so emotional man ʕ´• ᴥ•̥`ʔ. Thanks for your concern ( ◜‿◝ )♡
My condition is so bad,I didn't even realise it,I have been ignoring it all.
It hit rn that how bad my condition is,what will I ever do in life?what is my future?forgot future,what should I do in my present?.
I ignore it,I always think that I'll do something,I'll somehow make it but how?.
It's just idk what.
I feel like crying I want to disappear(*_*)(*_*).
Should I die?man dying feels like the best option but I am also scared of dying.
I'm just exhausted tho I m mostly in my bed these iam no doing anything✌.
I am fat lazzy bitchhhhh:^).
Ughhh, what should I do?!
Life always tests me,like it tests my temper.
I have a bad,very very bad Temper,like I just get easily anger and also it's maybe easier to ragebaite me O_o.
Ig my sister always ragebaites me!!!!
Anyways I always get angry but I control it and now it's like therse so much anger filled inside my mind like so so much!.
And whenever I am angry I always want to hit people,break things,maybe kill people ⊙﹏⊙
Ok that's weird.
But ig it's normal.
Also,I am a fatty.
Iam ugly chubby girl(not all chubby girls are cute),I have heard that people who are fat are nice and cool!I try to be nice but idk about cool.
Also saw this in a reel
"जिन लोगों को चर्बी ज्यादा होती है वो अधिकतर अच्छे स्वभाव के होते हैं व वे खुश रहते हैं"(something like this, can't remember correctly)
Respect that,but why am I not happy or cool?why?am I defective?!
Like half of my problems come from being fat!
I can't even lose weight,you know why?
Because I have gained weight because of stress and anxiety and to loose weight I have to control it. End it,but how?!how do I control my stress and ANXIETY?!
I have tried dieting,I have tried working out.
༎ຶ‿༎ຶ
Oh lord! end my misery!! (╥﹏╥)(╥﹏╥)
They say that I'll cry blood tears that I'll be beaten to death,that no one will be by my side,that I am so useless and worthless,that I am so unlucky,that I'll never ever be happy.
Like already know these,tell me anything else!
I already know that I'll never ever be happy,that I'll be all alone in the future,that I'll cry tears of blood,that I'll be beaten to death,and I also know how useless and worthless I am,I already know,so tell me something else!
Also,I don't have even know If I'll be in this world,I don't know if I even have a future?maybe I won't be there anymore?.
Maybe I don't have a future?
Maybe I'll die somewhere in between?
Idk man!
Mental health have been messed up and on top these people are adding ghee to the fire.
Like just as I was thinking that I should not be alive anymore,I shouldn't live I should die,she brought me another reason to not be alive (•‿•).
Anyways if ur looking forward for an update I will give u all tonight!also am bringing a new story(≧▽≦).
Boys really are something
My cousin was like"oh so ur jealous of ur friend because she has a boyfriend?".bitch wtf? ༎ຶ‿༎ຶ༎ຶ‿༎ຶ
If you say so I am jealous of the boyfriend because he has her!as his gf ༎ຶ‿༎ຶ༎ຶ‿༎ຶ༎ຶ‿༎ຶ.
Btw I am looking for a gf, let me know if anyone wants to be my gf◉‿◉.
@jgschild ha achha hi gya tha(joker wali emoji):-)
I don't think that I'll be living more than 20 years,cuz the pain is increasing day by day and it's getting worse brooooo,I might not survive much :-\
maybe I will die today rn?who knows
I feel so useless,like I can't do anything.
I literally mess up everything.
My father,he doesn't really try to understand me, it's fine can't that's ok but atleast don't say those hurtful things.
Like,if I say a joke he just straight up starts to talk how am not good at studies how am not enough how I am not like other good kids.
And it hurts so much, it hurts so soo much!
I feel like I shouldn't exist,I feel like I should have died in place of my brother.
Why didn't I die?!if I had died in place of my brother this life could have been useful,this life wouldn't have been wasted!my parents would have been happy cuz they have a son,who is good at studies,who is useful,who listens to them,the society won't throw taunts at them for having daughters.my sister would have been happy,she would have a brother.my grandma could have had a grandson, a heir,just imagine how much happy would they all have been!.
I want to disappear,I really don't want to be here anymore!I am just an disappoint.
Why was I even born,why do I even exist?!
@Hoshi1511 i also have 1 bsf but nowadays she have distanced herself from me,and 2 close friends but nowadays they don't talk with meಥ‿ಥ. Boring personality My photo insta is pret_aatma._ the pfp is yoongis pic! the iconic silver face mask pic :-P (There are so many acc with ur name,u follow me first)
@ieattwinks same gurllll,I wish I could but everyday it gets worse and worse༎ຶ‿༎ຶ I should thank you(⊃ • ʖ̫ • )⊃my insta is pret aatma,I will message u reply :-)also if you don't want to be friends with me then say no rn,cuz I already have like a dozen "friends"who don't give a f about me and ignore me ,it hurts me༎ຶ‿༎ຶ so if u don't want to then say no rn it's ok•́ ‿ ,•̀
Oh my gwadddd(-̩̩̩-̩̩̩-̩̩̩-̩̩̩-̩̩̩___-̩̩̩-̩̩̩-̩̩̩-̩̩̩-̩̩̩)gurllllllll(o´･_･)っ
thanks for all these words!!!but I truly am a disappointment :) they have sacrificed so many things for me,for my sister,but they were also forced by their parents,my grandma so much worse,my mother's grandparents didn't let her study,and forced into this marriage she was abused for like a decade by her in-laws, hearing taunts that she haven't gave birth to a child,so it's pretty much a generational trauma they are passing on,but it effects me so baddd,I don't see any point of living life,like at the end everything will end!no one will be here,nor I ,I will also leave this world someday, anyways I love them,u can say they are my whole life(・_・;).and u weren't rude at all,u were just consoling me༎ຶ‿༎ຶneede to hear that,I have some friends,but I can't really open up to them,I am not that close with them,so yeah it's all burried hereಥ‿ಥthankssss gurlieeeee,lobe u(〒﹏〒) ♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡
Btw will u be friends with me?ಥ‿ಥ
(Ps my english is not bhery good:-\