Fr3aksh0w

HELLOO!! You guys know when I crashed out, right? I basically was depressed and I'm not sure if I still am or not but the whole 9 months of the school year was me getting bullied. Yeah. Picked on in my face and that's why I started cutting my wrists which my sister found out, why my school told my mom about my suicidal thoughts, and why I started getting my ass beat and yelled at every other day. 
          
          I'm sorry about the Wi-Fi problem!! Also, me not posting was probably my depression too. Just wanted you guys to know I had a reason why I was feeling this and not posting <3
          
          The school year is going well so far but I feel like I started becoming so much more mean then I usually am. I keep saying stuff about my mom and I know I shouldn't but she LOWKEY DESERVES IT. Anyways, I started cussing more etc. Idk what's happening and why but wtv. And I keep shaking when I'm mad or sad. Is that normal? It's like panic. Like I wanna cry but not. 
          
          And I FEEL SO BAD FOR WHAT'S HAPPENING TO HYUNJIN ON BUBBLE. I CRIED DAY AND NIGHT FOR HIM. Is his shoulder better and are the members okay? FELIX IS GROWING EYE BAGS. 

I'M SORRY I'VE BEEN GONE BUT I'M BACKKKJ. I GOT MY WIFIDIDIDID. 

are my messages not going through? 

Don't you ever just wanna crawl in a corner and cry? Like, you have tears you wanna let out but you aren't sad enough yet to ACTUALLY cry them out? Is it normal to feel like that all the time? I always feel upset yet I still smile. Like.. Genuinely smile, yet I feel nothing with that smile. Why did I smile if I wasn't happy? Why do I always feel like this? Everyone that writes has something going on. Life isn't fair. I always have something making me feel down. Even if its nothing. The nothingness makes me feel down. Does that make sense? I have no motivation to write nor live anymore, but I'm too scared to kill myself.  How do people kill themselves without fearing it? I wish I had that feeling. I would've been dead and gone from all of this FUCKING BULLSHIT already 
          
          The fact you were born without a choice. I wanna fucking die. I don't care how. I want it to be painless and fast. I know what I want. I wish I had a twin that ate me FUCKING WHOLE IN THAT DAMN WOMB. I wish I could rot to death. Fast... And painless. People who care will get over it. The fact that I wrote this without thinking 
          
          Concerning but not.
          
          I need to do something to get my mind off everything in this world. I wish I could stab somebody. This world is so small. I hope I painlessly die in my sleep. Death is such a funny thing 
          
          Just fucking kill me already.. I beg. Anyways. Have a good night. Whoever's reading this, I know you feel the same. Nobody ever cares about anybody's feelings. Like.. Do people wonder why I have no motivation to do the thing that concerns them? I was supposed to end this, but there's too much to talk about. I wish I could go on a killing spree, but I have a heart. Yet, I would and will murder anyone and everyone who made my life hell. Actually, I only would if jail wasn't a thing. Hell, IF I'D FUCKING RIGHT AFTER KILLING THEM ALL, THEN I WOULDN'T HAVE TO WORRY ABOUT JAIL. Don't blame me if I become Suicidal 

Hello! Just wanted to thank you for adding It Began With a Text to your reading list, much appreciated <3 Hope you enjoy it!

Guys... I think I'm straight. I also figured out my great great grandfather is nikocado avocado 
          
          He's been losing weight recently, so I'll accept it now 
          
          Yo mama so fat- 
          
          
          Good night luvs