InfiniteMarissa

ATTENTION: the first five chapters of A Luna's Destiny is now up, I will be posting the next five soon depending on if the rewrite has a good enough positive reaction. 

InfiniteMarissa

"I told you I loved you and with a smile on my face but I can see we meant it differently" you're right. I loved you. But it was lust for you. I waited for you because when you love someone you stay about them even if you aren't together. You think going off with a different girl made me believe you actually loved me? And when I finally took a step toward someone else after months it was f me right? Cause I'm always in the wrong right? I must be always wrong because I allowed myself to be your yard dog on a chain for so damn long. Living off the little scraps you'd feed me while I watched through the window as you ate with the cats. Everyone seen it. I was a f*cking fool for you. And when you seen me break off my chain I rattled your home and suddenly I was what you wanted? And then you wanted me to leave a good guy who'd protect me and appreciate me more than you for you? And when I didn't i was the insane then? That's just it? You play the victim and I play insane ? And even AFTER the fact , I forgave you for our fight?! And allowed you back in?!! To disrespect me more!! I was a punching bag for you for your emotional war because I knew you needed someone to be. But I cannot do it anymore. It's been to many times to forgive now. I'm going to move forward to a better and brighter future with someone who betters me rather than tears me down to make themselves better. I hate that you oversaw all the good I ever did when I messed up once. I can't keep myself and still keep you too. I wish you nothing but the best. I hope you make it. 

InfiniteMarissa

It's been one week and two days, it's true when they say "it will hurt until it doesn't", and although I still have a swollen ache in my chest I know that I can move on with my life. But there's a part of me I can't feel anymore, I don't know if I lost my fear for many things or its my body wanting to be freed of the shackles of liberation by the laws of life. My body wanting freedom. But I lost something when I lost you, and I can't tell if it's good or bad. 

InfiniteMarissa

It's 12:24 pm.. It feels like there's a hole in my chest. I can't eat. I can't sleep. The only thing that I've done to ease my pain is cry. I can't stop crying. Your gone and for some reason you left a hole in my universe. How did you become that important to me, so fast?

InfiniteMarissa

I was laying on my back. Your room was dark, your room lit only by the TV and the hall light and the setting sun. I could see all the highlights of the large map in front of your window above your bed that we'd always look at and point out where we want to go. We always laughed when we couldn't pronounce some of the places on the world, mostly the places in Africa. You were twirling one of my curls around your finger and looking at me as I talked about Brazil being one of the places I would travel too.
          When I turned to look at you I watched your lips pull into an inquisitive smile. 
          I asked "what?"
          You answered "I'm just trying to put you together"
          I furrowed my brows at you and shifted onto my side to look at you better. I asked you what you got so far.
          You replied "well I feel I only have twenty percent of you figured out but I think your an independent woman that doesn't want to be alone anymore"
          I laughed and looked back up at the ceiling because I didn't want you to see how deep your words actually hit.
          I laughed because I was scared, at how true that was. I was tired of being alone, I didn't want to be alone anymore. and from there on out I was terrified of losing you. That's when you bit me and poisoned me.