"There are two things that are infinite. The universe and human stupidity, and I'm not too sure about the universe
-Einstein"
I sexually Identify as an Attack Helicopter ever since I was a boy I dreamed of soaring over the oilfields dropping hot sticky loads on disgusting foreigners. People say to me that a person being a helicopter is impossible and I'm fûcking retarded but I don't care, I'm beautiful. I'm having a plastic surgeon install rotary blades, 30 mm cannons and AGM-114 Hellfire missiles on my body. From now on I want you guys to call me "Apache" and respect my right to kîll from above and kîll needlessly. If you can't accept me you're a heliphobe and need to check your vehicle privilege. Thank you for being so understanding.
"GET OUT OF MY BATHROOM REEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE"
-PUBG player
Alright children time for a story!
*picks up book*
Once upon a a time, he spanked my ass like an African drum
- Tip toeing in my Johns
- JoinedNovember 29, 2017
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I am sad*insert picture of Adam Sandler with instead of a body, a sandle*(This is important, don’t ask why)View all Conversations
Stories by SHITPOST LORD
- 2 Published Stories
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Overwatch Memes (Because I can)
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If you don't know what Overwatch it. WATCH THE FÛCKING SHORts