Kailey

Yk how sometimes family members make fun of you without realizing it might hurt? Well when I was younger, before I went through depression and all... I was fairly skinny. And so now at 14 I have a bigger body and I'm not skinny, I have some weight to me you know? I used to be pretty insecure but I've grown from it. My family refers to my prior photos as when I was starving though. And they don't know that it actually affects me. I know we all like to joke with family but just use your words carefully because deep down they may still hold some insecurity to it. They might feel hurt. Just use your words carefully loves! 
              .   .              -    Kai. ❤

Two years ago I was crying my bedroom tempted to harm myself. And I eventually did. Two months ago I was still wondering if depression was a forever kinda thing. I would be awake at two am not being able to sleep as all I could do was judge my past mistakes and watch sad multifandom or audios so I could feel like I wasn't the only one. It had gotten better but I couldn't stand the silence. And I recently realized that now I can. For the first time in a very long time I feel at peace again. I feel like the silence can't suffocate me anymore. I pleasure in listening to my hear beat knowing I didn't give up. I'm no longer mad at myself. Instead, Im so proud of myself. Things are finally going uphill for me. I don't feel lonely and depressed at night or in a full room. I'm turning 14 in two months. (YAY) I've just been accepted into the highschool I've worked so hard to get into. (It's a career prepared something kinda highschool) I'm starting this program where I'll be working out with other girls and talking about body positivity. (I'm learning how to love myself) And I've never felt so much at piece. I just want you all to know there is a way out of the darkness. Take care! -Kailey ❤

Random Confession Time!
          
          I'm always listening to music because I can't stand the silence and the thoughts that come with it. The music distracts me, lifts my mood, takes me to a different place. Do you enjoy the silence unlike me?

Just noticed you've given my story a chance. So I'm dropping by to let you know that I truly appreciate it and hope you'll find my work worth-it. Feedback and comments are more than welcome. Once again, thank you so much for making my day better ❤️

Can I dump something on you guys? 
          
          People ever tell you that you look/sound depressed.? 
          
          Well people do to me. And I'm told my music is depressing. Well I'd rather hear music that I either relate to or that has a message then some song that the singer says random things and curses a ton. 
          
          It bothers me... 
          
          Why? 
          
          There was a point when I was ACTUALLY depressed and you didn't notice. There was a point when I cried myself to sleep and you didn't hear my quiet sobs. There was a time when I didn't believe in myself. And those "depressing" Songs are what helped me heal. 
          
          Those songs get me through the day. You don't know this but I'm still really hurting deep down. when I'm alone and my mind goes down a dark path and then I play the music and it lifts my spirits just a bit. 
          
          And you calling me chubby as a joke because we're family bothers me deep down. Sometimes the most I eat in a day is a granola bar and dinner. It's not because I'm too lazy to make myself something. It's because I gained 20 lb.s in a year and my insecurities get to me. 
          
          I'm sorry that I'm too afraid to speak up but I hate talking about the way I feel. I'm sorry that you'll never know how I feel. I'm sorry that I secretly get really offended when you joke about suicide. I had suicidal thoughts once. I didn't think I was worth living. So I'm sorry but it hurts. 
          
          And you don't know this but my straight A's they aren't easy to get. I get really stressed out. I'm just good at hiding how I feel, like always. I'm not sure why I'm even writing this... Probably so I don't have an emotional breakdown. A person can only stay strong for so long heh
          
          Sorry for dumping this on you. I just wanna feel like for once somebody hears me without me trying. Take care <3
          
          

@resilient_tanya Hey Tanya no worries at all I've really enjoyed it. I don't think I've finished it because I've been busy but I will. I hope if you have the time you could check out some of my stories "The girl she left behind" in particular I haven't gotten much input. Stay safe and keep doing what you're doing. You're great at what you do!
          
          -Kailey ❤

Please go check out my story "The girl she left behind" The second chapter is up and running. Comment and vote please. Comments make my day alllot better. Take care yall ❤
          -Kai
          https://www.wattpad.com/story/247076792

I NEED OPINIONS!!!
          
          Okay so I am writing a story on paper right now and I need a guy name. I'm kinda in between Zeke or Miles.... But I will take suggestions as well. Also, if you could share your opinions for a last name that would be AMAZING!!! If you wanna leave some suggested girl names too be my guest. I love hearing what you guys think.  Love you alll and take care!!!!! ❤ ❤ ❤
          
          -Kai ❤

This is for you, MY BEST FRIEND. Read this message until the end, it's adorable. I sent an angel to watch over you last night, but it came back. When I asked "Why?" the angel said "Angels don't watch over angels." Twenty angels are in your world. Ten of them are sleeping, nine of them are playing, and one is reading this message. God has seen you struggling with some things, and God says "It's over." A blessing is coming your way. If you believe in God, send this to fourteen friends, including me. If I don't get it back, I guess I'm not one of them. As soon as you get five replies, someone you love will quietly surprise you... Not joking. Pass this message on. Please don't ignore it. You are being tested and God is going to fix two big things tonight in your favor. If you believe in God, drop everything and pass it on. TOMORROW Will Be The Best Day Of Your Life. DONT BREAK THIS
          
          CHAIN. SEND THIS TO FOURTEEN FRIENDS IN TEN MINUTES. IT'S NOT THAT HARD. NO GROUP CHATS

Chapter one of paranoia is up. You may check it out if you'd like. I'd truly appreciate it. I update my stories slowly so I appreciate the patience. Take care!  -Kai ❤