JLMeadow

3/3
          
          I am desperate to return to God, and yet I feel stuck, like my feet are glued to the same spot I've been in for the past few years. It feels like I try, but I am yanked back into my flesh and my laziness, and my unwillingness to truly repent and turn from my distance from God. 
          
          I'm not sure why I'm writing this. I'm not even sure that anyone will see it or read it. I'm not sure what the future looks like for any writing or studies, though in my soul I am desperate to return. Surely, though, to every thing there is a purpose for the glory of God. 
          
          If anyone does read this, I encourage you to explore Revalation 2:1-5 for yourself. It is my hope and prayer that you have not wound up like me, just like these folks, who have left their first love. If you have, I will be praying for both of us, that we can return to those first works and have the joy of our salvation rekindled. 
          
          Much love to you all, 
          JL

2/3
          
          The message hit me like a train wreck. I felt the weight of a ton of bricks rest atop of my shoulders as I realized that I am exactly the type of person that God is speaking to in this passage. Where I used to be so in love with the Lord, so infatuated with Him, I am not anymore. I haven't been in a long time. 
          
          I used to read my Bible every day. I journaled. I sought Him out in prayer and study, desperate to grow closer to Him and to understand Him. I was a witness to my family, who seemingly began to follow my lead (I did not hide what I was doing, I just did so in the comfort of my room behind a closed door). 
          
          Now, I pray every day still, but I am distracted. I am not seeking Him as I should be, I am seeking answers for my own little worldly issues. Not that talking to God about these things is "bad," but I haven't truly prayed with the intention of seeking Him in what feels like ages. I don't read my Bible every day. I cannot tell you when I last did a Bible study, and certainly not in depth. If it weren't published here, I would not recall the last time I had written anything for the glory of My Savior. I go through the motions, stuck in routine, and I am more miserable than ever. 

It’s been a while…
          
          I started this account over a year ago now, publishing a couple of short Bible studies on my page. I had every intention of continuing my studies, writing, and publishing them with the hope of reaching anyone with the encouragement and salvation I had found in Christ. My flesh had other plans for me, though, and I let it get in my way. I am deeply ashamed of that fact. 
          
          I have been plagued by shame over my failings. I have failed God in more ways than I can even begin to list off. Most of all, I have been distant from Him, running away in a petty attempt to avoid the guilt that plagued my heart and soul. I’ve been easing back into things. I’ve started attending church regularly months ago, my husband and I have started to attend Wednesday night services as well, and we’re starting to try to read the Bible together every night. 
          
          I am jealous of the person I used to be. My pastor preached a message this past Sunday about the church of Ephesus in Revalation 2:1-5, which is a picture of modern day Christians as well as this church - and unfortunately, a perfect image of myself. 
          
          God is saying to this church, in short, “I see all that you’ve done to glorify me. I know your works, your patience, and that you have tested those who prophesy falsely. But I have something against you - you have left your first love. Remember from where you have fallen, and return to your first works, or I will come quickly and remove your lamp stand from its place.” Of course, that is a very abbreviated “in-my-own-words” summary of those few verses, so I encourage anyone reading this message to read those verses for yourself. 
          
          (1/2)

hello, could you check out my two stories?
          
          https://www.wattpad.com/story/380725926?utm_source=ios&utm_medium=link&utm_content=story_info&wp_page=story_details&wp_uname=kaitlyn-mariee
          
          this one here is recent 
          
          would mean the world to me, I can do the same for you
          
          make sure to follow | vote | comment | share
          
          have a wonderful rest of your day | night 
          
          appreciate you for looking 
          
          would mean the world to me, I can do the same for you
          
          make sure to follow | vote | comment | share
          
          have a wonderful rest of your day | night 
          
          appreciate you for looking 

Thanks for the follow and adding my book to your reading list! 

You should check out this amazing Christian romance book. It's realistic and brings forth new light to the genre of Christian Fiction:)
          
          https://www.wattpad.com/story/321173212?utm_source=android&utm_medium=link&utm_content=share_writing&wp_page=create&wp_uname=TheChristianPrincess&wp_originator=J8QBu7R2jbCfs1PCcnSetT6OlinTsfJWoEvzv8pfTa7OkMN6ePZIvxXfNi%2FKGdd2iTZL2Qbezdy8INZDve2YMyHa3LuFgt5%2BRynVTMkydqwoQjJ9nvGv%2BDe45OU06oDp

I ask Heavenly Father to grant your favor. Amen!

Hey guys! 
          
          I could definitely use your prayers. I’ve started a new job full time, and I’m still in school full time until next semester.
          
          That said, I’m hoping to avoid burnout as best as I can! 
          
          I’m also praying for God to help me to watch my mouth, and to avoid sounding like the people I’m surrounded by who tend to curse a lot. 
          
          I look forward to being more active on Wattpad in the near future, but bear with me as I navigate this new - and very busy - reality. I’ll continue posting sometime in the near future (probably a month or two), though I may have to allocate more time in between updates. 
          
          I am absolutely beyond blessed, and I thank bc God for the number of opportunities he’s presented to me. 
          
          God bless all of you! 
          
          Much love, 
          JL

You should check out this amazing Christian romance book. It's realistic and brings forth new light to the genre of Christian Fiction:)
          
          
          https://www.wattpad.com/story/321173212?utm_source=android&utm_medium=link&utm_content=share_writing&wp_page=create&wp_uname=TheChristianPrincess&wp_originator=sqpRZGBtd7P1ca25Lq%2Fz0mEBwXNijoEiIyXVs7yvENZqncr%2FBbwmhkM7BPGBHPOPgsi0fl%2FBzsWNfib6X%2BqU3RCdKS5Q%2F6myKbQKZYs46Rztmr8IqtfQiJuilNcizMaW

thank you for following me love! ✨✨