I go through the worst breakdowns ever and nobody ever gets it, likeee, they think I'm just either overreacting or overthinking my situations or the circumstances. I mean, I get it that worrying about stuff doesn't fix or make them go away, but forgive me if sometimes I feel so much in a dump that I can't see the light at the end of the tunnel. Why am I having breakdowns? All I ever hear is "stop comparing yourselves with others" or "everyone has their time". I know all of that. I'm very much aware that everybody is different as are their lives, too. We cannot all have our flowers all at once. But is it wrong to want good things to happen to me, say, four times in a row? I've worked hard (still working) my whole life, but then, when it gets to my turn, everything just freaking flops like I put in novice energy even though my literal entire being was invested in it. I just want stuff to work out; I want to feel like I've done something and feel the joys of accomplishment, even just once. But it's always a different story in my case. It's always been. I hate that I have to come on here and publicly rant about personal issues, but even underneath all the silent crying and wishing I was never born in the first place, I dare to hope that someday I'll come back to this post and there'd be a huge difference between now and then.
thanks for reading through the whole rant if you did. Ps - you don't have to comment.
