eliii

anywyas, off topic, i think it’s time for me to move on after g (read chapter g on my yapp session to understand). like i made a whole ass acc to stalk her but i deleted tiktok bc of some issues but i downloaded it back and can’t log back in my acc bc i forgot the password and gmail i used to log in it. sighhhh
          
          nooo i don’t wanna move on just yet but it’s been like 3 yrs now and she has a gf so ig i should move onnn

i wish i was allowed to do things kids my age do. i can’t dye my hair, i can’t get my nails done, i can’t use makeup, i can’t use lash clusters or lash extensions, i can’t wear slightly revealing clothes, i can’t drink monster, i cant do anythinggg. the amount of freedom k have to express myself is the same one that 12 years old have

like i’ve been homeschool for 2 yrs and only have 2 friends who come over to my house to hang out and i don’t even go outside anymore bc where am i supposed to go when my unc ahh brother can’t dry and my dad won’t wanna take me anymore bc of the whole ice thingy going on. so now it just feels like my teenage yrs r going to waste and the way i can ATLEAST manage to enjoy them is by going to school irl which i can’t my stupid ahh brother can’t freaking drive. my d can’t drop me off like before bc of his job but my brother don’t do nun but play roblox, eat, and sleep all day. it’s tiring and sad. i nvr imagined my life to be like this at 14 and honestly it’s pretty sad. 

my dad is thinking of making me go back for this half year of 8th grade aka last yr of middle school which is yayy bc i can have some time to enjoy school before i start highschool( which is serious) BUTT that school was mad ghetto and i’m to socially awkward for that…. like when k entered in 6th and barely knew anybody, i was still a bit more social bc of 5th grade ( which i miss so badly) but now it’s like ughh i lost the little amount of socialness i had

anywyas, kwdknsnd j miss school n miss having a social life but i know that if i ever end up going back to school, i wont be as social as k was before and that just sucks im so sad

gosh i hate that we can’t add emojis on our mb

guys why do i have sm nostalgia when im not even a nostalgic person 

she texted me ksndbenf i cant bro “tu ok”. skdkdndn im kit sol bruh and ur one of the reasons atmwndjekdnr wndejndrjebf i can’t majen this is a silent for me to jsut go to sleep bc i honestly don’t wanna do smth stupid rn that i wilntegedt in the morning

omfg

wanna block her. should i ? idk. idkidkidkidk bruhhh idk if her acc got deactivated and she nvr followed me or told me but hahahahsh i wouldn’t be surprised tbh jajajajajajsjjssksknsamd ill pretend i nvr begged her to stay and that i wasn’t so pathetic to beg her to not leave me yesyesyes ill pretend everything from april nvr happens ill pretend like she wasn’t one of the reasons from making my mh rlly bad hahahahah atp i js ruin the best friendships jajsjsksjsnd i got blocked k got blocked i got blocked im nvr being vurnersble to anyone ever again and im nvr begging anyone to not leave me ever again