Boredom. That is what brought me here. The limitations of life has forced me to open up my own reality where I can do whatever I desire, whenever I please. Writing has allowed me to share my adventures with anyone  who lives in a pineapple under the sea. Oops, theme song in the background. So, join me as I embark on a quest to find myself in the form of words. I'm done. I can't say anything else. Why does it have to be so formal, jeez. OK, here's the deal. You will read my stories because the polar bear does not simply buy ice cream for his friends. Did it work? Guess not. Want some candy? I got candy! Just, read my stories and you'll get some. Though, I would have to transport it via truck and... I'm going off topic aren't I? Ah, some toffee would do just nice. Maybe some cake too! Or...