Eliyel
Hey
I bet you must be young, I often see that type of writing. I only have one advice to tell : cure your spelling and grammar, I spotted some "your" instead of "you're". That will give a better look to your global writing I won't comment on the rest because that's each one's opinion and we have quite different ways of interpreting a book
Eliyel
This is something striking that I usually notice quite quickly (occupational hazard). Just saying, then you do you
K0K0R0
Ok, do you tell everyone that their grammar needs checking? Not trying to be rude or anything
