La min kabyar

I am a newbie, so I would be really glad if you could review and give me feedback on my work.
          It would really help me improve my skills.Sorry to bother you.(◍•ᴗ•◍)
          
          
          https://www.wattpad.com/story/380074279?utm_source=android&utm_medium=whatsapp&utm_content=story_info&wp_page=story_details_button&wp_uname=Rinatomii

Hey have a look to this book if u are bts fan https://www.wattpad.com/story/353180145?utm_source=ios&utm_medium=link&utm_content=story_info&wp_page=story_details&wp_uname=Amanses