At 7:52, Guam Time, it was announced that Liam James Payne has died. Although I have not met him, nor interacted with him in any shape or form, he played a big role in my life. Prior to allegations on his behavior, I admired him during his One Direction years. He was the first celebrity I truly had a crush on and dreamt of one day meeting. I would stay up in the dead of night writing fanfiction. I would write during class as I fanaticized what it would be like if One Direction came to Guam and Liam whisked me away from an island in the middle of the ocean. I dreamt of attending a One Direction concert and have him sing directly to me then meeting back stage. We'd fall in love and have two beautiful children together in a mansion in England. I'd imagine what my name would be like with his last name attached to it, Mrs. Ariadne Payne, as I would scroll through tumblr edits.
He got my through my depression. Feeling the pressure of High school, being single while everyone around me was in a relationship, changes in life I wasn't ready for. One Direction made me feel less lonely. Watching edits on YouTube and interviews and behind the scenes of their music videos, made me feel like I was apart of something. It made me feel like I had a family.
I started writing because of Liam and my delusions. I found my passion in life. I pursued a degree in English with a minor in Writing and became a teacher. I wouldn't be where I am in life without him. Wattpad and my fangirl obsessions created that spark in me.
Liam has played a big role in my life. From my username, Liadne (Liam and Ariadne), to my signature. This has been the longest day of my life. The most difficult to get through with a brave face. I got home and cried in my husbands arms, 12 hours after reading the news. I let out a good cry, and there will be more tears to come, but it is now time to say goodbye.
I love you Liam James Payne. Rest in Peace. Thank you for being a big part of my life.
