LiveLoveandPlay

I’M NOT BORED ANYMORE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

A: goddamn this list is so fucking long *is writing a vocabulary list with 46 words*
          B: i'm sorry baby 
          A: i wish they'd put it in rainbow order 
          B: uh huh? 
          A: ... 
          A: GOD I MEANT ALPHABETICALLY JESUS FUCK 
          B: *CRACKS UP*

A witch and a satanist in school... 
          Satanist friend: I like how the only reason I know that is because of pentagrams. 
          Me: Draw a pentagram on your math exam to summon satan so he can help you finish it.

A: *says something offensive to B*
          B: sticks and stones may break my bones-
          C, kicking down the door: BUT CHAINS AND WHIPS EXCITE MEEEEE
          B: YOU’RE HORRIBLE

A: I can’t find Alex we need him here now.
          B: Hold on, I got this.
          B: *clears throat* I had a bad day.
          *sudden silence*
          *crashing in the distance*
          *rapid footsteps*
          Me: Did somebody say-
          *crashes head through door*
          Me: *holding spilled coffee* A bad day?

I found this on Tumblr:
          “I… I just turned a robber into a cat!”
          -other character lights cigarette- “Yer a wizard Harry…”
          “You just quoted HARRY FUCKING POTTER AT a time like this?!”
          “Well yeah… What am I supposed to do? You’re name is Harry and you are a wizard, this is fucking perfect.”
          “I am really starting to hate you.”

A: Ok, let’s just agree to say “I’m sorry” on the count of three.
          A: One… Two… Three.
          B:
          C:
          D:
          E:
          A: See, now I’m just disappointed in all of us.

Teacher: …So, if you murder someone the night before your 18th birthday, you can’t be charged.
          Me: Noted.
          Classmate: Aaaaaaaand that’s why we think you’re a serial killer

Cookie: I have a question! Do yo- 
          A person: Do you wanna make out? 
          Cookie: No. 
          Cookie: ... maybe 
          Cookie: ... yes

A: B, you’re bleeding.
          B: Oh, that explains it.
          A: Explains what?
          B: The stabbing pain in my side