Jara🇻🇪vnzl

I have been gone for a whiille, I'm sorry
          
          And I came back just cuz I have a crisis and this is my personal (public) diary soo
          
          I feel like this is a gender fluid crisis of sorts, cuz we found out recently that my tatas (iykyk) are too big for my small body and have been making me have bad back problems that will worsen with age. And I've been given the option to have a reduction for free (since I'm a minor)
          
          But, I don't really know if I want it. First of all, I'm scared bc we found out that I have very low iron, so low in fact that any sort of surgery could be lethal for me, but also I sometimes feel good having them. Yeah, some days I can't look in the mirror for long and wish I could pull them out of my chest and chuck them into the sea, but other times I look in the mirror and go "you fucking rock"
          
          Everyone keeps reminding me that I have until I'm 18 for a free appointment, or else I'll be waisting a lot of money when I knew I could do this sooner. 
          
          Soo, I'm considering telling my doctor and actually getting the reduction, but I'm still very scared and am not 100% sure I'm even comfortable with doing it, but I'll see

This thought has been in my mind for so fucking long, I need to get it out
          
          Stranger Things related
          
          I genuinely think that Steve's parents are just for forever 24/7 absent, but they probably send him money one way or another. Through checks or just in the mail. Idk how people sent each other money back in the 80's. But I really hope pray and want for Steve to just stay in his house. I have been reading some fics and they all make him move out of the house, or the parents come back and are disappointed their "perfect child" isn't so perfect anymore. And I'm just here like "he's canonically 20-21 years old, he could buy the house if he wanted. Make it be under his name and not his father's or something. Idk I just genuinely like the thought of him staying there. And a lot of fics mention how barb died in his property and pool, so obviously he'd feel guilty, but no one actually knows that she died in the (upside down) pool, just that she disappeared. For all they knew she dissapeared in the woods, on the way to her car. And, also, Steve didn't know Barb as much as Nancy. So, naturally, he'd get over her death pretty quickly. Maybe not the "she technically died in my house" part, bc even if she didn't die inside his house, she died near it. And, honestly, if I knew some person died or dissapeared and was last seen near my house, I'd freak out. Especially if I knew them one way or another, or like Steve, quite literally had them over in my house before they disappeared. I'd feel pretty guilty and paranoid too, but not to the point where I'd move houses. And I don't think Steve would either. 
          
          Also I just really like the thought of the Wheeler parents to get tired of the kids always coming over, and Steve just offering his house. 

I've been gone a while, jeez
          
          I have an actual good excuse for that this time
          
          I got a job! :D
          I'm being paid real well, and since I come home late I go to bed almost immediately just to wake up two hours before my shift to actually get dressed and shit. Yes it takes that long. 
          
          Anyways, I'll probably come back every once in a while, unless I forget again :/
          
          Anyways, this was just a quick update before dipping again. Okay, bye bye now! 

Modern Minecraft sort world where Gapples are legendary, but since they were super expensive (along with potions) back in the day, poor people had to make their own medicines. Advil and all the other medicines that we know. Only super duper rich and important people have tried Gapples, but no one is know for being able to eat or even see them 24/7. Until, young Witch Tommy is seen eating a Gapple out in the streets as if it were normal. People freak out and soon it trends. People start seeing this same blond kid eating Gapples like they're a fruit you find on a tree and not a magical curing fruit that is made, earned and valied by all of society. It gets to the point where people recognize him in the streets, and finally someone asks him "where do you find these?" and he responds, all confused "at home?" The more people get invested, the sooner they meet Tommy's family. It's a normal family, like any other. Every member a random hybrid or person with abilities. But the peculiar thing is that his brothers make both potions (Wilbur) and Gapples (Techno) themselves, and their parents turn out to have matching Ender Dragon eyes (real ones) for the time they both defeated one. Normal, yet absolutely awesome family, that somehoe nobody knew about. 

Okay, this is random, but y'all know how I'm not trans, right? Like, I use all pronouns and don't like being always perceived with the feminine ones, but I'm more confident about it now than before, and I just remembered this one time my parents said something that, I know they were trying to be supportive, but now when I think about it it's just wrong, like, they said the wrong thing and thank God I'm not actually trans cuz that would have fucking hurt me back then
          
          I was still having a gender crisis back then, worse than the one I have now, and I remember putting on a cap and hiding my hair in it, and asking my parents if I looked like a guy. They like paused for a bit before they said something like "we support you if you want to be a boy, but you'll always be a girl in our eyes and we love you" 
          
          Like, that was sweet back then, but now it's like, wtf kinda response is that?? Telling your trans kid that you'll never actually see them as who they are is so messed up but I didn't really get it back then so I just told them it wasn't like that, that it was just a question and that I love them too, but now I'm like holy shit

Lmao, I just remembered something my parents told me
          
          So, apparently, there was this like Hispanic thing, idk if it was/is specifically something Venezuelans do or all Hispanics but, they named their children by mixing each other (the parents's) names. My sister used to have a friend name with the mix of the name I think Carlos and Anna, Carlana maybe? I forgot, but turns out my mom wanted to call me something similar. It's not a mix of their names, not even close, but she wanted me to call me fucking Yubiritzaida
          
          I shit you not
          
          Could you imagine me introducing myself to people after movie to Canada like "Bonjour, je m'appelle Yubiritzaida" like wtf XD
          
          Omg the French accent on my name would suck, it already does with my actual name, imagine with that 

Just a random thought that I'm pretty sure I talked about before, but I'm not sure
          
          I think c!Tommy definitely had to amputate his leg in exile when he ran to Techno's. Cuz you would have to amputate a limb if it's severely frostbitten, and of I remember correctly Tommy's exile skin had a missing shoe. Also, I'm pretty sure being stranded in an island that had a snow biome just a few feet away isn't the warmest of places. Meaning, Tommy could have most likely had hypothermia. Maybe mild, but definitely there, and it would have gotten worse the further he got into the snow biome. So, unlike all those fanfics where Tommy has a prosthetic cuz Dream cut his leg off, it's just from a natural cause that was unstoppable bc of his conditions. And, even after he reached Techno's house, Tommy stayed in the basement. I'm pretty sure that's also not warm enough. So, after Techno finally found him, he must have obviously seen the damage, and definitely would have noticed how even after Tommy stole and drank and ate all his stuff that is meant to help recover just wouldn't work, and he would have had to cut the leg off for Tommy

This is a weird thought, but is it just me that worries I'm gonna die before whatever event it is I'm waiting for? 
          
          Like, for example, if me and my friends plan to hang out in the weekend, I'd start to worry and become paranoid, thinking I'm going to die before I ever get to do that event, even if it's literally seconds away. Or even with exams. I have my final math exam tomorrow and idk why I'm worrying I might die before my exam. The same with the English exam on Friday, and the French one which actually now that I think about it I have not been preparing not do I even know when it is. But, yeah, idk why I keep thinking that while expecting an event. And it's not even the type of jokingly going "ugh, I wish I'd die before my exams so I won't have to do them" No. It's literally me being "what if I die before the event and I never get to do it in the first place? What will happen?" etc. 
          
          Also, accompanying this with the English exam coming up. Why tf does the teacher take away our phones?? We have to write a short story for the exam. In our computers. With fucking google. The exact same shit as our phones, and you take them away? Like, wtf? Nothing changes and you just make me late every day cuz I always forget to get it back. But, the computers have fucking access to everything. Hell, my friend sees Tik Tok and Instagram through his computer. I watch YouTube when I have nothi else to do. What is your goal here? Just seriously, wth??? 

I've been gone longer than expected, damn. Hope everyone's still alive and all
          
          I just came here to real quick fangirl over the fact that 
          
          STRANGER THINGS SEASON FOUR IS OUT BABY, FUCK YEAH, OMG I WILL CRY OF HAPPINESS I LOVE THIS SERIES 
          
          Also to complain about the fact that the right side of my hair is curly while the left side is wavy. It makes no sense

OKAY, IT'S LATE BUT I THOUGHT OF THIS AND I REALLY COULDN'T JUST NOT TELL YOU 
          
          Remember that "Stay Alive (Reprise)" idea where Shroud is Philip and Tommy's Eliza? Okay, what if Clementine is Angelica (Hamilton, so Alex and Eliza's daughter, not Eliza's sister Angelica Schuyler)? 
          
          This is like months or a year or so after Shroud died, and Tommy and Clementine are still staying with the rest of SBI. Something happens, similar to Shroud's situation where he went and challenged someone that talked shit about his dad, or something like that, and Clementine (just like Shroud) goes to her Uncles instead of her dad to now worry him. Thankfully though, Techno and Wilbur learned their lesson and immediately dragged her home and told Tommy. An argument breaks out, but Techno and Wilbur don't get involved, they're just standing there for like moral support or something. And then this happens
          
          I'm sure everyone's familiar with the audio "You're too important! [I am not!] Yes you are! [No!] Why won't you just let me do this for you ROSE?!" 
          
          Yeah, so that happens, obviously Tommy instead says "Shroud" not "Rose", but yeah, you can use your imagination for how the argument actually goes or what happens afterwards :)