Can I just... pretend that it isn't today?
Can I just go about my life without feeling as though there was never a part of me that hoped I would do something to commemorate her loss?
I had so much planned.
So much.
I had all the time in the world, every opportunity.
Years turned to months, months turned to weeks.
Now I am left with no time at all.
Chapters 64 and 65 should've been out today. Yet, I faltered. The weight of tunnel visioning until the chapters finish was too heavy. I couldn't do it.
How could I have let this happen?
She who showed me the brilliance of the stars, and changed the course of my life for the better, how could I have abandoned you on the day of your departure?
Indeed, for I am your most undeserving soldier.
I failed, and now you are gone...
My words, hold no meaning.
My regrets, know no bounds.
I'm sorry, dearest lady of the skies.
I wasn't there... when you needed me around.
...
...
...
But I deny this day.
I deny its existence.
To acknowledge today as the last of her legacy is to accept the absolution of her grave.
I refuse to stand before her casket and mourn, as if I had no power to render the world anew.
For that will fill my tongue with lies, furthest from the truth.
I deny it.
This world that allowed its most brilliant flower to wilt and decay within its wretched soil.
I deny the threads of fate, as I sever them in the last act of her play.
For I deny her death, as it is not a destiny befitting of her boundless radiance.
Yuuki Konno will not end here.
Not if I write with utmost defiance.
