I'm Chitaia and I am 15 years old. I love to write poetry and look within myself for the truth. I would like to have people look up to me for inspiration. I'm a hopeless romantic and I love to have fun.Sometimes I feel invincible and some days I just want to fall over and not move. I have my highs and my lows. Everyday feels like a battle to overcome all the bad things that I experienced. Poetry is an outlet for my pain. I don't know that anyone will ever fully understand how my mind works. Everyday feels overwhelming and pointless. I'm afraid of being judged and rejected. I feel like a mirror because I reflect the personality of whomever I'm with. If you asked me to describe myself I wouldn't know how to answer. You can smile everyday of your life but it doesn't mean your happy. You can pretend to love yourself but it doesn't mean you do. If you tell the same lie over and over again eventually it will become the truth. If I smile and laugh everyday maybe one day the smile will become real. The only thing I can do is try to move on from my past and keep my secrets well hidden.