@niallersprincess1d96 umm for the Hayes Grier one maybe make the POVs a little longer and include more conversation maybe and I guess show a bit more of their feelings a bit with like blushing or stuttering when they talk so it's obvious for the readers I guess. I'm not really a writer but I've noticed this stuff in other books I have read, oh and maybe a date night in your story too : )
@niallersprincess1d96 well just keep trying don't give up either there's always obsticals you have to face if you want to do good in anything, just keep trying : ) people will come back