Unknown

Hon ur idea is nice ok but u need to research first second u tell a story like ur painting a picture 
          Draw the outlines then details then color it 
          It's very dry like ur reading the news 
          No emotions no thinking no smooth transitions he's standing in front of the door then a slut is siting in his lap ---weird 
          Anyway l like ur idea it's fun and amusing the sequence of events is cool too 

im updated my book Nessa !!! llsss im jih late doeee

http://www.wattpad.com/story/10184085-no-one-has-loved-you-as-much-as-i-do
          
          Hi this is my new book, will you plz give it a read.

UPDATE!!!