@my-dearest I just read it, and I think it’s great so far! Apart from a few spelling errors and such, it’s quite good. If I had to suggest something, I’d say use a few more commas instead of abruptly breaking of the sentence (it’s better than run-on sentences though, which I have a tendency to write.) English is my first language, so if you have any questions, feel free to ask me. And PLEASE continue the story!