Do you ever get the feeling where you miss someone so much, and they fill your mind so completely, that you can almost feel them in the other room, waiting for you with their smile wide and arms open. Do you ever feel like you can sleep unless you hear their voice? Only the smell of their old shirts keeps you sane when the day gets rough? Do you ever feel so completely alone when your sitting in a crowd, all because THAT PERSON isn't beside you, their hand in yours, their words cupping your ear?
Everyday. Every day I miss him so completely I cannot function. Every time I look at my rings and know who gave them to me and the promise they held. Every time I cry, every time I wish to hear the brush of my name on his lips. To be loved by him and only him. To be held and have a life with only him. To have what has fixed, and broken me so thoroughly, back home in my arms; where I know he is safe. Every letter I write and every story I type. Every song I create, and every note I strum. Every second that ticks by on my old wall clock, every time I see someone who remotely looks like him. My heart aches and all I can think about is him.
Now, I don't know if that is what love is, but I pray with all my being, that he returns home safe and sound. The Marines is a cruel place but I know he can do it. Only 38 more days until he comes home to the broken down mess I have become.
Everyday, I miss him more and more.
Everyday, I regret letting him leave without him hearing my last goodbye, and without kissing him before he left me.
When he returns, I hope he still loves me the way he did before he left, and i hope he loves me as much as I love him now.
It is all I can hope for really...
