Occupation: The British Government, British Secret Service and Freelancer for the CIA

I am worries about my younger brother Sherlock Holmes, constantly. The feud between us is simply childish, people will suffer and it always upset Mummy. You can imagine the Christmas dinners?

Oh and while we're on the subject of food, the diet's going fine by the way. No, I'm not putting on weight again, but losing it, in fact!

If you were to ask Sherlock about me, he would probably tell you I'm his archenemy, in his mind anyway.

You do not contact me, I contact you, and if I ever chooses to, rest assured I won't make some sort of threat as your situation will be quite clear to you. Should you ever meet me, I will likely be the most dangerous man you've ever met. I will never text though, not if I can talk. That is unless I have got a dental appointment and having a root canal anyway.

My powers of deduction equal if not supersede Sherlock's own who has always been so resentful. Not that I have the time for any case that requires 'leg work'. After all, I can't possibly be away from the office for any length of time, not with the Korean elections so... well, you don't need to know about that, do you?

Colleague: @Anthea_Black (Of course that's not her real name, works for me, but that's classified. She spends most of her time on her BlackBerry, but that's classified too.)