overdosed on autism

I love my boyfriend AGHH I CANT STOP THINKING ABOUT HIM!!!

New yap fest because I can’t sleep and I feel like shit. Winter break; mid. Didn’t even go out because of people being sick and also family biz. Online friends: scared I’m gonna push them away. I feel like whenever I join my friends they are gonna think I’m some sort of crazy lunatic that’s obsessed with connection like a starved alien, and they’re gonna cut contact with my and I’m never gonna see them again and I also feel like a bitch because I.. *accidentally* got my friend banned for a day. Dealing with a bunch of stuff, some of my friends are being more distant, which, I’m not sure if it makes me some whiny mf, but I feel is my fault. I feel like a burden, a stain, even. Whenever I get on call with them, it feels like I’m constantly so loud, annoying, and overall like a piece of shit. I hope I don’t push them away.

I hope i die in my sleep so I can die peacefully

god I can’t stop making fucking fursonas in Roblox holy shittt y’all don’t even know how much money I blew on my proto and my y2k Urghh also I think I’m going through another wave of depression and/or self-identity crisis because I can’t tell atp

anyways so after that yapfest
          uh
          still wanna kms teehee
          bazinga

*hugs* <3

*Ahem.* So, I'm back after, what, 4-ish months? How about a little recap, I guess. I have gotten tremendously worse mentally, I'm constantly talking about killing myself, and I have only made a few friends within these few months i have been gone. I have not been happy, nor do I think I actually will be in the time coming. Whatever, it's not like anyone will even fuckin' care, right? I'm just rambling on and on about 'oh how terrible' my life is on this random site I never use. I am going to get myself lost and killed in a remote area, so that nobody will find my body, and nobody will be sad. Actually, my life's been good. I've made friends that actually care for me, ones that will actually listen, and comfort me, something i feel like i have always been expected to give, and it feels good, but at the same time, kinda wrong? i mean, it's good to talk about my problems, insecurities, etc. but like, i feel like i'm burdening them by doing this. I had an actual talk with one of my online friends, and i'll admit, tears were shed, but it made me feel better, lighter on my feet, the whole spiel. I love all of you, never forget that. please, PLEASE, do not hesitate to come talk to me, not as if you have to, but as a friend.

I should kill myself.

ohio gyatt skibidi fortnite e sigma poppy playtime chicken nugget max design pro skibidi pomni and jax GETTING FREAKY!?!?!! (COPS CALLED) (GONE WILD) (GONE SEXUAL!?!?!?!?!) im back guys

did everyone simultaneously die what happened