Overly_Enthusiastic

Ok so guys the spinoff has to be caught up to Veridia so I won't be updating in a while. I cooked up some good stuff for the spinoff though: hopefully you guys will like it

NishaPsons

Hi sorry for posting without your permission, I hope everything is going well there. 
          
          If your time permits, then check out my book. ❤ 
          
          You will really like the tangy taste of teen with a bitter pinch of broken hearts.
          
          Happy Reading
          https://www.wattpad.com/story/335763523-we-live-under-the-same-sky

Overly_Enthusiastic

Hey! I don’t have time to read the whole thing, but I did take a look at the first two chapter. Overall, I think the story is well written! However, I do think that it’s a bit too stiff and embellished in some places, causing the reader to feel distanced from the character. The character is supposed to be a person, just like us, and the way you write sometimes makes me think that “hey wait a sec, I wouldn’t talk like that if I was the character.”
            
            Remember, this is just my suggestion, and you don’t have to listen to it or anything. Do what feels right to you. Keep writing!
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Overly_Enthusiastic

GUYS. I've been rereading Veridia for errors, and THERE ARE SO MANY. YALL GOTTA TELL ME WHEN I MAKE SPELLING/GRAMMAR MISTAKES. Help me become a better writer and help the community get a better book, please.

Overly_Enthusiastic

Comment anything, even if it's a roast about how cheesy and bad I am. Just make sure to suggest stuff to fix with it.
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