If you are a person who acts friendly but has an evil mind and is secretly plotting world domination

If you have ever tried to take over the world, but were distracted by something shiny

If you have ever just wanted to SLAP someone

If you know someone who should get run over by a bus

93 percent of American teens would have a severe emotional breakdown if someone called them a freak If youre a part of the 7 percent who would ask the person what was your first clue?

If you're a slacker and proud of it

If you have ever run into a door

If you have ever tripped over your own feet

If you are a chocoholic 

If you've been on the computer for hours on end, reading numerous stories

If you ever fell off a chair backwards 

If you have ever accidentally stabbed yourself or someone else with a pencil

If you've ever wondered what you are like in another dimension 

You must be a Wattpadder

MURPHY'S LESSER KNOWN LAWS

Light travels faster than sound. This is why some people appear bright until you hear them speak

 He who laughs last thinks slowest

 Change is inevitable except from a vending machine

 Nothing is foolproof to a sufficiently talented fool

You think your all that and a bag of chips Well Im all that and a bag of skittles So taste my rainbow

Yes I hit like a girl You could too if you hit just a little bit harder

Theres  nothing wrong with talking to random objects it's when they start to talk back that you need to worry

Nine of the ten Voices in my head think Im sane the tenth is undecided

When Life gives you lemons squirt them in Life's eye and see how much Life likes lemons then.

You say I've lost my sanity. Well I have news for you You can't lose what you never had

Yeah, Im a loser but the coolest loser you'll ever meet