Pheonixblues

I FIGURED OUT HOW TO POST IT ONLY TOOK LIKE 5 HOURS

Pheonixblues

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I didn't get any Lifesavers evergreen mints and I'm sick as hell I can barely feel my back and my throat feels clogged and my saliva feels stuck in my mouth like there's no empty space and it tastes disgusting and every time I stand up my head hurts In a booming way and my eyelids hurt and I'm fucking cold but burning hot at the same time and basically the only thing that doesn't hurt are my hands and i ate some Mac&Cheese that I made and refrigerated yesterday and it just made my mouth taste worse and- actually imma stop there.
          I'm in hell but this happens most of the time I'm sick.
          
           AND I had a stupid dream last night that traumatized me (I'm calling it a dream not a nightmare for like two reasons).  imma rant about it because I need to express my feelings in one way or another. Prolly gonna be a long one.
          
          It started at my school. There was somehow a surprise field trip and we got put on one of those yellow school busses without our bags and anything. They told us we would be on the trip for a week. (Us as in me and enough of my schoolmates to fill one of those busses with two ppl per seat) The 'lore' of the dream was that this was a field trip that almost every student went on. No one talked about anything that happened in it and pretended that they didn't know anything about a trip. But they definitely knew what happened on it, I could tell (maybe cuz it was my DREAM) The bus had BLOOD stains and 'EQUIPMENT'. (STILL A DREAM.) We left after one of my teachers from 1st~4th grade in a Taiwanese school got on the bus and told us what we were here for. I didn't even hate her that much- she just told me to ignore my fucking bullies even though the school said they would do something about things like that.  (ME NOW COULD PROBABLY DO THAT BUT ME BACK THEN... OOH... I WAS A FUCKING PUSSY. I WAS FUCKING SENSITIVE AS FUCK AND THEY MADE ME WANT TO KMS- I don't anymore -I HATED THAT BUT I COULDN'T CHANGE IT BECAUSE I WAS A FUCKING PUSSY.) 
          
          I'm at the limit for words. SHI

Pheonixblues

Okay only small parts were made up, to explain the gaps. But the MAJORITY and all the 'juicy' parts were from my memory.
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Pheonixblues

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Last part! 
            NEEDLES.
            
            I think we just teleported back to my school, because I can't even picture any drive or travel back at all. When we were in the lot of my school, (NOT EVEN WHERE THE BUSSES GO HELLO?) someone came on. Idk who the hell they were just that they were like the average white American doctor, with lab coat and mask. Oh yeah, and a FUCKING NEEDLE IN THEIR HAND. I am DEATHLY scared of needles and it's low-key hurting to write about them rn. (EVEN MORE THAN MY BODY ALREADY HURTS) 
            so basically what happened was the guy needled both me and Y. Idk what happened next but Y died. DESERVED. (Not irl.) The next thing that I remember is the end. I think it was a year later or something. I was  lying on the front lawn of one of my friend's houses with them. When I heard a bus coming. I sat up and saw THE MURDER BUS. STAINS AND ALL. But when I looked through the windows, I saw kids. I stared and they stared back. That's when I WOKE UP. god bless FINALLY. (Why is god blessing me I don't even believe in him hello?) I checked the time and it was around 12 hours after I went to bed. That was a long dream, and goddamn I could DEFINITELY tell in the moment. 
            
            Onto why it's a dream and not a nightmare. 
            Because J and Y died. That's it. I am smiling slightly while writing this. (I DONT WANT THEM TO DIE IRL ITS JUST... YEAH)
            
            
            
            To anyone who took time out of their day to read this, Thank you. 
            
            (I don't think anyone would, and why the hell would you in the first place. I'm a nobody here.
            
            I'm sorry for the... Err... Contents of my dream. 
            
            HAVE A GOOD DAY/NIGHT/DAWN/DUSK OR ANY OTHER TIME. 
            TRY NOT TO BE LIKE 4TH GRADE ME.
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Pheonixblues

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ALMOST the last one.
            THERE'S STILL BLOOD IN THE BUS BUT NEVER MENTIONED. AS WELL AS 'PINK STUFF'.
            
            We drove past a park and I saw cosplayers or something. (This is the most memorable part of the DREAM) I kid you not, I yelled "IS THAT WATO?!". I saw like Kenadian and Wato1876 cosplayers or smth. (I LOVE THE TWO OKAY?) We stopped at a mall or something nearby in the parking lot. We got out and the teacher must have been feeling nice, because she allowed us to go greet the cosplayers, ONLY IF she followed us. (SHE HAS THIS CREEPY ASS SMILE ON HER FACE) We get to the park and I don't remember any specific cosplays, just that there wasn't anyone cosplaying Wato or Kenadian. And no one acted like anything was wrong, despite there being OBVIOUS blood and/or wounds on us. I don't remember anything else there, I just know that when we left, THREE people got ran over this time. THERE WAS MORE PINK STUFF. SOMEHOW THE PINK STUFF WAS THE THING THAT MADE ME MOST DISGUSTED THIS WHOLE DREAM. so now there was only two people left. Me and the girl I hate most out of anything, Y. (BACKSTORY ON Y: <this is like majority of this part> I fucking hate the bitch. She used to be my 'best friend'. Through 3rd and 4th grade. But in 4th grade she decided to FUCKING MAKE ME WANT TO KMS. Her actions flip-flopped from friendly behavior to FUCKING TOXIC ASS BITCH. but younger me, A FUCKING IDIOT mind you, kept crawling back. Because "She can change!" Or "she doesn't actually mean it!" Or some other STUPID FUCKING REASON. Y made me depressed for OVER A YEAR. AND FUCKING DEPRESSED DEPRESSED. "Oh bro you depressed depressed " NO IM NOT. IM DEPRESSED DEPRESSED DEPRESSED DEPRESSED DEPRESSED. okay maybe not that much- but you get it. When I FINALLY moved back to America <we moved to Taiwan when I was 4> I was pretty happy about leaving the bitch behind. I grew happier and happier during 5th grade, until two BITCHES who's names also start with J. Made me want to DO IT again. Now I'm happier!)
            
            LIMIT
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