Chicken God

Wishing you a wonderful Happy New Year PhoenixFirebird19.

Merry Christmas Phoenix hope you didn't hate me after years ago

Merry Christmas PhoenixFirebird19 & I do wish you a very cheerful & Happy Holiday & hope you feel mich better with the joy of smile & happiness.

Hey phoenix i know your probably not going to see this so I'll keep it short i hope you are okay my friend but ever since the incident with eric everything gone down hill with you guys gene gone pedo smesh disappeared and eric barely writes anymore but dispite all that we all have lives outside of Wattpad so i hope you are living it in the best way possible if not you'll get through it like how the turtle wins a race with the rabbit it never gives up anyways see ya bro 

Happy Thanksgiving PhoenixFirebird19.

Just wanted to wish you a Happy Halloween, PhoenixFirebird19 & I hope you're alright.

Happy 4th Of July PhoenixFirebird19.

Hey

Even the slightest sinch of seriousness whether it be anger, sadness, or tension towards me or around me can trigger a fight or flight response in me which just resulted in me being quiet, scared, or generally upset. I'm either on the verge of mentally ill or my brain never fully matured. It explains a little of why I just distance myself from others so much. I don't RP as much anymore, and I don't socialize as much anymore. At this point, I'm not sure what to do anymore besides trying to live life until I finally can't keep my thoughts or emotions bottled up. I've become more self aware of what goes on or what I do, how low I am, how I regret of not doing better. All I can do is try to keep going, especially as I'm typing this, slowly feeling better again. I'll probably not be online again for a long while as the process of moving to a new location might happen for my family and I very soon, if we can find a place. I've completely forgot about making a new chapter for my story too, but at this point, I won't bother trying to. I'll try to be ok, perhaps try cutting off weight and other unhealthy habits. If there are others who feel depressed in the world, it's understandable. We just keep going, as well as needing that reminder that we do matter to someone out there.

I'ma be honest, these past couple of weeks have been very depressing for me. I hoped that this month would be the same as always but progressive. Unfortunately, it's not the case as a lot happened. What I thought was terrifying but actually the least of my worries was my elbow having fluid trapped inside, which I needed removed, and it emptied a lot from my wallet. Thankfully I'm better now, but now my family and I are now having issues with the hospitality of our rented place. A lot is happening and with the bare minimum that I make along with my father and brother, I would say that all I saved for a better future is most likely going to go down the drain pretty soon. Reflecting back on the situation I'm dealing with it's now become one of these periods in time where I've been the most negative since 2020, and I know because it was slightly leading to a panic attack for me. The fact of saying I'm fine would be a lie since for the past decade, I've definitely not been fine on different levels, whether it be the stress of work in my early age, the depression I felt at school, the pressure I'm given due to my father's terrible work behavior, to the responsibility I now have to carry not only as an adult, but to support my parents and their future. I've always been optimistic, too reliant on my family to support me, slightly autistic during situations like this, often cowardly, silent as well, for the most part I always run away to my hobbies to get away from it all when obviously it won't solve much.