this message may be offensive
This is nothing important. Just some rants about my current writing status. X
-I have thought of this for like so long already. Gusto ko sanang mag-hiatus for the whole December. I feel so drained right now, really. Parang ayoko munang magpatuloy. I mean, wattpad really is something I cherish—and will still continually cherish for my entire life. Writing is something that I would never want to abandon—yet, ngayon, I feel like I need to—kahit temporarily lang. I feel like shit because I'm not even halfway through finishing my book but look at me—ranting, typing these words furiously while slowly letting my soul expire(figurative). I hope no one actually reads this since it's embarrassing. I feel so sick of my book, the way my plot revolves around the main characters, the way my characters act. I just don't feel the same excitement kapag nagsusulat ako ngayon kaysa noon na bago pa lamang ang plot sa isip ko. Honestly, as I writer, I feel ashamed. Naturingang author pero tamad namang mag-sulat. Sometimes, I just feel like this is not for me. I feel tired. I'm drained. Ganoon ang mga sinasabi ko pero honestly, sa tingin ko ay naghahanap lang ako ng dahilan upang hindi mag-sulat. Humiliation eats me up sa tuwing nakakakita ako ng notification sa wattpad about other writers' story updates. Alam ko na hindi isang karera ang pagsusulat. I know I don't always have to match the pace of other writers. Pero sometimes I just think this way, "They're updating, dapat ganoon din ako." Parang gusto kong kamunghian ang libro ko. Honestly, one reason why I decided to go on hiatus is because of some toxic wattpad people. Sana naman kasi ay matuto silang gumalang sa akda ng may akda. Sorry, I'm not really in my best shape to write right now. Sorry. This is honestly humiliating. Pipikit na lang ako mamaya when I post this. Nawa'y hindi niyo ako i-bash dahil sa mga sinabi ko.