Princessprethi

I genuinly hate my parents I cant explain but I just feel genuinly angry right now I just feel like my accomplishments are always under mined and I dont feel special and they are the reason I used to have such low self worth. they say comparing is bad and you should never compare kids but then they make remarks such as your cousin did this your cousin did that they will be more infintly sucussful than you in the future cuz everyone is taking eingineering and your not and me on the other hand I will never be good at math no matter how much effort I put into it so whats the point. its just during elementary school the only time i eveer got praised was for my grades and now that my grades started falling or turned average i been hearing nothing but negative remarks i guess no matter what i do i will never be good enough huh. its like they never even tried to get to know me outside of the grades I get at school I mean I did try to do other hobbies as a kid like I had a YT channle at some point but I dont really post there anymore. I dont like them in fact i want to distance myself from them there were just some things they did that I cant move on and I feel like they will hurt me again I mean I didnt want this you know to be born and go through all this I just feel so empty

I want to rewrite Kanato X Azusa it was my first fanfic so I didnt really know what I was doing you know maybe after the entier fic is finished I will most likely go back and rewrite older chapters

Hello everyone Kanato x Azusa is taking a short break I'm working on Kou x Subaru right now dw you will still see Kanato and Azusa in the fic for chapter 1 anyways thats all the news chapter 10 for Kanato x Azusa is under progression

We are supposed to go on our trip today at the end of school year they take us to a amusement park but honestly I don't feel like interacting with anyone and I am not happy even though I passed the school year my fight with my parents still bother me I tried to write my fanfic but my mind is blank and I don't know how to continue I just feel very numb right now to everything it's just I'm still thinking about the argument yesterday something about that day really hurt me I feel bad for saying I'm gonna commit suicide to my parents yesterday even though I haven't thought about doing it in a long time but it's just when they yelled at me again for a short moment I felt like I had to escape and the only way to do so is by ending my life I really hope I can get a good degree and move out I don't want to live like this

Hey so I can't sleep mentally I'm not feeling well my body is cold my chest is tight and my head is probably gonna hurt from crying I can't go to sleep I feel like throwing up rn I have vapor rub for head ache but I just feel really upset it's really hard to talk about what is upsetting me because of my long running trauma I find it hard to express what about the situation I am in that is bothering one of it could be the verbal abuse perhaps but the other.... We will figure it out together maybe ╮╭

Hey guys why do I feel like dying sometimes when I get yelled at by parents they say what I am going through isn't bad but why why do I genuinely feel this way sometimes when they yell I want to leave the convo and move to some other place but I just am forced to sit down and listen if I fight with something I get scolded as well

GUYSS AZUSA AND KANATO WOULD BE SO CUTE TOGETHER I really want to see them in a relationship and I want to make it canonically as possible when writing it so I am doing research but I feel like Im forgetting something important I think its the fact they are canonically rivals but I made them soften up to each other more because the vampires in dark fate are generally more nicer towards Yui I'm kinda starting to doubt things maybe I should have started from more, blood but dark fate was the first game I downloaded so... So if in my fanfic they aren't in a relationship until dark date that means when I write more, blood there won't be any affectionate moments with them but rather blood sucking. Isn't it crazy how I felt empty just moments ago now I don't feel as empty anymore well I still feel a bit empty but I am feeling better it's just I feel like my parents are gonna start bugging me about my plans for the future and I dont wanna deal that rn. I haven't thought about it and Im scared about the thought of growing to a adult like what if I turn 18 finish college have my bachelors and still can't find a job I don't want to live at home forever I'm scared. And I am also a bit worried that when I grow up I'm gonna be forced into a arranged marriage with a guy I don't like guys I'm gay. I don't want to do something I don't like so I have to be successful and move out as soon as possible. People in my family are homophobic so I haven't told them and I don't plan to any time soon but ya I guess I am worried about a lot of things but talking about it here puts me a bit at ease

I feel so depressed school why does this always happen during vacaition look I dont look forward to going to school but during summer vacaition i feel so depressed. you think my phycial health would be better but I have a litral head ache I tried sleeping it off as well as vapour rubs but it wont go away I feel throwing up had ache my eye kinda hurts and bonus I feel so empty and depressed its really hurts... gosh someone save me I dont wanna feel this way plz

Chapter 8 is my longest chapter for the kanato x azusa fanfic but its my favorite chapter so far i cant wait for them to just bang already but ik there is a time a place they will bang soon trust chapter 9 is gonna be heated omg HEHEHEHE you dont understand how much i fantaize about these two characters being to together i know i am like probably 10 years too late for this and the fandom died BUT I LOVE THIS SHIP SO MUCH I DEDICATE MY SOUL AND LIFE TO SHIPPING BOTH OF THEM TOGETHER I cant get this ship out of mind i am too addicited. I shoud really start my school work right now but i have no motivaition school is burning me out i hope i can pass this year i gotta lock for just 2 more weeks but my i cant concentrate on anything but this ship uhm anyways sorry for my ranting chapter 9 will be out soon whenever i escape from the basement bye bye i dont think anyone is reading this but erm love you all :>

I am not sure if people are reading my fanfic but chapter 7 might take a while I am still working on it dw I'm not going anywhere and I dont plan to abondening this project anytime soon currently I'm playing through the games and lisitening to more drama cds to get more idea of the relationship between these two character so i can make a good fanfic this ship doesnt have a lot of fanfic but i really like this ship alot so i want to give them a happy ending :>