RAPDEVIL_

Are you @fix_ur_face?

i have an emotional attachment to my ex - and honestly, he let it get that way. not me. his fault.
          
          
          i can’t deal with the hot and cold.
          i begged him to stay he doesn’t listen, if i don’t beg him then i don’t care about him and his absence just “doesn’t bother me”.
          
          
          i can’t deal with the i’m in love with you one minute and then the don’t contact me i hate you the next minute.
          
          
          it’s been a game since december and im kinda sick for likin it. 
          
          he’s like my favorite person - i knew i was a bad influence but i felt like he got me for some reason. everything he said meant something to me.
          
          he meant something and he gave me something to live for
          
          i can’t top that 
          
          every time im in a relationship i kind of just think about him - it’s not that i wanna break up with my girlfriend - i don’t wanna lose her at all actually 
          
          he just genuinely fucked me up and sometimes i wonder if actually killing myself would make a difference - and i hate myself for thinking that. it’s incredibly toxic and disgusting.
          
          
          and yeah, boundaries are boundaries whatever. but really how am i supposed to know what you want from me when it changes every 5 seconds? you’re the first thing i have ever loved and you think i can just do what you do. i don’t relate to you there.
          
          
          it’s not really that i want him back i just feel like our story isn’t done. when im happy he just resurfaces and i feel like shit and wanna blow my head off.

damn huzz how many accounts do you have

i begged my ex to stay i’ll never do it again.

I do come on here yes