Moldy Lemon Water :)

Some tips. I honestly love your writting and theres almost no mistakes.
          
          A tip would be to start a new paragraph when someone is thinking or talking. 
          
          Try to add feelings and senses when a character is describing someone, example: Her hands were as soft as silk.
          
          Start a new paragraph when the topic is changing.
          
          I think those tips will help you alot.
          
          Good luck with writting, im here if you need me.