RedMonkeyButt

https://www.wattpad.com/story/402200902?utm_source=android&utm_medium=link&utm_content=story_info&wp_page=story_details_button&wp_uname=NL-JOHN

Am I the only one who actually likes it when an author mentions the music they listen to when they write? I can’t be, or it wouldn’t be a thing. I’ve found some music I wouldn’t have otherwise listened to from this and I think that’s awesome.

I rub my cat backwards because it pisses her off and amuses me. I’m 90% sure this is the primary reason she knocks shit off tables. On a related note… would it be cruel to bring her to Petco and let her pick out a mouse dinner? And who would it actually be cruel for? Not her. I guarantee she’d lose her little kitty mind. 

*telling people I cooked the thing they liked*
          
          “But how much of that did you use?”
          
          *tips a bottle…* “That much.”
          
          “That’s not a measurement.”
          
          “Put that in the pot until you feel good about your life choices.”

Reading through the titles under random tags…
          
          *35 parts, 1h read time*
          *24 parts, 30m read time*
          
          Looking at my drafts…
          *5 parts, 3h read time*
          
          

*write write write write*
          
          *post*
          
          *format all the things*
          
          *save as draft*
          
          *see typo*
          
          *eye twitch*

Have you ever had one of those days? You know the one I’m talking about. The day where you write 10k words and pat yourself on the back for a good writing day… but it wasn’t for an active story you’re publishing here? ‍♀️

Don’t tell me to mow the weeds growing at the edge of a public roadway and not in my yard. I will not mow those weeds. But I WILL burn them with a flamethrower just to spite you for being a worthless HOA.

Any time I make a shifter character jump in one of my stories, it’s the equivalent of a cat seeing a cucumber. There is calm kitty and there is cucumber kitty. There is no in between.

Every time I read a story where Character A averts Character B’s eyes… all I see is someone reaching out and snatching someone else’s eyeballs out their head to make them turn them. Welcome to my late night thought process.